Piranha Sharks (2014)

recommended

The performances transcend the film's tropes, grounding it in characters that feel more complete than this subgenre often produces.

The movie really just wants to entertain people.

.Like the great film, it's made with a great deal of visible affection both in front of and behind the camera.

First things first, will admit to not expecting much. The premise sounded ridiculous and it looked pretty bad. Even when trying to find some good in them, although there are good ones ('Jaws' being the king of them all) and some guilty pleasure ones shark films generally have not scored highly with me even when trying to take them for what they are.Before anybody gets defensive, am well aware that films like 'Piranha Sharks' are not ones to be taken seriously. Have seen my fair share of low-budget shark films, and any other kind of low-budget creature film, and will admit to finding some guilty fun in some of them (i.e. the first two 'Sharknado' films). There are marginally worse shark films than 'Piranha Sharks' certainly. Sadly 'Piranha Sharks' is just too amateurish to accept as a guilty pleasure, where nearly everything is just poor quality that it's insulting and there is nowhere near enough fun, intentional or unintentional, moments. Was not expecting anything intelligent here, am well versed now to know that it is not that kind of film, but 'Piranha Sharks' does feel like it was made by somebody who didn't know how to give a film brains, so much so that it'll make the viewer feel dumb and that is not a nice sensation to feel watching a film. 'Piranha Sharks' does have a couple of small redeeming quality. The opening scene was actually pretty entertaining, something that put the viewer in the mood for some very dumb but guilty pleasure fun. Unfortunately, it rapidly fell downhill, where ridiculousness and cheapness amongst other things were taken to extremes. Kevin Sorbo also tries his best to inject some energy into his role.Visually, 'Piranha Sharks' is yet another low-budget shark attack film that looks cheap and like it was made with no budget, heart or enthusiasm. Any nice scenery that the movie has is difficult to appreciate when the movie is shot in such a drab way and when it's edited so amateurishly that bacon-slicer-like editing looks more refined. Worst of all in this regard are the effects, as it was made on low-budget it would have been forgiven a little if it was not great, but when the effects for the shark look as if no effort was given in making them without looking so goofy and unfinished-looking that is hard to ignore.The opening scene apart, so the shark's lack of presence or personality, it's not menacing, it's not scary and it's not fun, it's not even strong enough to bring any unintentional humour or goofiness, that's how bland it is. The music is very generic and adds very little, it's not always appropriate either and quite a lot of it is actually pretty annoying.Writing ranges between incredibly bad to appalling. Any comedy is incredibly forced and is so cheesy it is enough to make the eyes roll in disbelief, while the more serious moments are very awkwardly written and as trite as anybody can possibly go. Regarding the shark attacks, some are rushed, others are badly drawn out. They lack any kind of suspense and the over-silliness to the point of intelligence-insulting stupidity, terrible shark effects, bad editing and even more gratuitous gore further cheapen them. Describing the story as weak is being too insulting to the word weak, it is a very lethargically paced and thin as ice story with lots of padding that is either badly written or serves no point at all to the movie, other than attempts at novelty value, which falls flat on its face because it all feels so tired. It is not fun, it is not scary and it is not thrilling or suspenseful, it's just nothing but tired stupidity.As for the characters, that they're tired cliches isn't so much a problem, the problem is that they are either obnoxious with them constantly doing stupid things, so bland that it makes zombies seem more animated or both. Some of them are superfluous to the story or come and go out of nowhere constantly. The direction is as flat as a pancake, and the acting is amateur hour awful, apart from Kevin Sorbo trying his best.Overall, a mess. 1/10 Bethany Cox

A Wonderful Comic/Monster WaterFest !!! Jessica Sonneborn is Spectacular Portraying a distraught Stripper; & Ashe Parker UnderGoes a Stunning Transformation into a Gloriously Beautiful Woman ! Kristina Page & Noel Thurman, in a Dual Role, Also put in Great Performances ! It's No Wonder that Kevin Sorbo has such a Hard Time keeping his pants on amidst these Lovely Ladies & a Bevy of Other Beauties !!! Ramona Mallory & Collin Galyean Do a Fabulous Job leading the Cast in this Action Adventure; & Al Snow shows Us a Slightly Different Side to his usual Persona ! It's Great Fun for Landlubbers & Seafarers Alike !!!

Got this in a supermarket under the name 'Jurassic Piranha' & knew it was going to be one of those SyFy films with cheap nasty effects & loads of clichés & bad script etc.I wasn't surprised as it had cheap CGI effects, over used clichés & a very short run time of 73 minutes. But weirdly enough I liked it. Somehow the story-line was a bit far fetched, I mean come on, they were going to nuke the entire city over Piranhas? And what's more we saw no other attacks aside from the people involved in the film? And alcohol killing them a weakness? It was all very stupid indeed & the film did feel rushed & very WOAH if you know what I mean! But you get what you paid for! After all, it did cost me only £3 in ASDA! But still it was a OK film with sh!t loads of flaws but somehow washed with me enough. It's fantasy mixed with horror & was alright, but not as good as Sharktopus or Lake Placid 2, that film especially showed it's form a cheap CGI at it's biggest form, but these films you expect them to be sh!t, with crappy effects, bad story-line a dumb way to kill off the monster at the end some nut head scientist & babes & muscle men etc. Along with bad effects & far fetched story-lines it's what you get & some are better than others being honest!Overall, this film was bearable & watchable for a quick flick! 6/10

Can it be? Can it really be that a movie called 'Piranha Sharks' is ANYTHING but 'So bad, I can't look away'?Yes, it can. It really can be more than that. In fact, I'd say it can actually be quite good.Everything in the movie works to accentuate the strongest points of the film. The comedy, acting, and script. These things are on point, and if you're looking to be entertained, you want to give this one a watch. Everything else that you might 'assume' would be 'bad' -- is simply there to enhance these key attributes of the overall film.The entire point, from beginning to end, is to have a FUN movie (so, if you're not into fun, shut the movie off and go back to your Sundance collection) -- but to have a fun movie, that also tells a story and has deep moments of character development, and interaction? You have to appreciate it for what it is. If you want to have some fun, and enjoy a script, and acting far superior to some of these other 'Sharktonadmech'- whatever movies out these days -- 'Piranha Sharks' is for you!