Rare Exports Inc. (2003)

The Worst Film Ever

Great visuals, story delivers no surprises

Although it has its amusing moments, in eneral the plot does not convince.

There are moments that feel comical, some horrific, and some downright inspiring but the tonal shifts hardly matter as the end results come to a film that's perfect for this time.

There's probably a hundred (short) films out there that get you in the spirit for the holidays, but really funny ones are a rarity. This one is definitely a decent Christmas comedy. It runs for slightly over 7 minutes, which is fine, but also pretty much the limit as the hunting scenes, which went on for a large part of the film really shouldn't have been longer, although the tension and curiosity about what they were hunting for was rising more and more. The over-the-top serious narrator did a pretty good job though and you could feel the funny tone from the way he spoke highly of the prey and praised it as "king of the forest" on one occasion for example.From the moment on where the bearded hunters caught it, it's absolutely hilarious. Interesting idea, convincing execution and definitely worth a watch during the holidays for being a somewhat different Christmas movie. Also there's a follow-up short film and even a feature film about the issue, which may very well be worth watching, but I haven't seen these, so can't say for sure. In any case it's good to see Jalmari Helander, the director gets the chance and will work with Samuel L. Jackson, Jim Broadbent and others on a project of international prestige.

Rare Exports, Inc. (2003)*** (out of 4)Short film that takes a look at a rare group of hunters in Finland who hunt one of the most deadly and rarest games in the world. The targets are elderly men who stalk the wild who the hunters eventually capture, train and release throughout the world as the creature known as Santa Claus. It seems this short was pretty much overlooked when it was originally released but it picked up steam and led to a semi-sequel as well as a feature-length film in 2010. There's no denying that this is an extremely well-made film and those who like their movies with a touch of surrealism will certainly want to check this out. What I loved most is how the movie really plays out like an introduction to a real comedy and I must admit that the narration was masterful in its serious tone and it really sets a wonderful mood for the picture. The scenes of the old man being hunted were extremely well edited and the scenes where they finally break him down were just so wrong yet at the same time so funny. Seeing Father Christmas hunted, beaten and eventually broken is something I'm sure many would be offended by but the film is just so well made that you can't help but laugh. I've always felt lines were meant to be cross and this one crosses it and makes up a few new ones along the way. The hype of the film has reached an all-time high and it lives up to it.

This short film has a very sick sense of humor and while I was a bit horrified but it, I also have to admit that it was very well made. However, I certainly DON'T recommend you allow younger viewers to see this film--for rather obvious reasons.The film was made in Scandinavia and features the most amazingly appropriate narration in English--the voice and style was great as was the script. As the narrator talks, you see several hunters stalking their prey--though for a long time in the film you have no idea what it is. Later, when they finally open fire, you see they are shooting at a naked "feral" Santa using tranquilizer guns. Apparently, according to this film, the Santas you see at shopping malls are actually bagged in the wild and subjected to excruciating "conditioning" (i.e, torture) to make them jolly and child-friendly! The whole thing is one long sick joke. Many will find it funny but many will also be horrified at seeing the naked Father Christmas being shot at, slapped around and beaten. Sick...but just the sort of film for grinches who dislike the holidays.By the way, this short was followed by yet another short and, finally, a full-length film called "Rare Exports: A Christmas Tale". All three films can be seen on the disc for the full-length movie.

This movie has been doing the rounds on the internet for the last couple of years in quicktime format, many people not realising that it is a serious (or otherwise) short movie. With around a minute and a half of credits, the length proper of this is only 6 minutes.This movie is about hunting, so keep the little ones out of view and earshot while watching it. It is an absolute masterpiece, so if you have broadband, do a search now and have a watch of it. If you decide to, then read no further, because:SPOILER -- SPOILER -- SPOILER -- SPOILER -- SPOILER -- SPOILERThere is a lead-up and reveal about halfway through. The start shows preparations for a hunt, but the prey is unknown until the first shot is fired, and we see a sedative dart in... A FATHER Christmas! They are the most precious free-roaming beast in the whole of the Northern wilderness we are told, but they are very dangerous.Get a copy now and see how a wild Father Christmas is tamed and prepared for export.