UKM: The Ultimate Killing Machine (2006)

Some things I liked some I did not.

Let's be realistic.

Good start, but then it gets ruined

It's an amazing and heartbreaking story.

Another embarrassment to Canadian film making. I think it was supposed to have some humour, but again first rule about being funny: don't try to be funny. Also, the acting was terrible, how anyone justifies putting the time in to do something like this and then some other jerk justifies buying it and then some idiot at Rogers justifies putting it on the air? I don't know. To the actors of this film, take some acting lessons and dig deep, because the audience deserves it. Acting is not easy and if you think you've done it here, you should probably quit. The whole thing is terrible. Terrible. Terrible. I could not even get past the first ten minutes. Michael Madsen is a good actor, but even the editing and shot selection made him look kind of weak.

UKM is one of those movies that we have all seen before. An obvious storyline with obvious characters that are going to do obvious things. But, the movie does movie along at a nice pace, and, if you are into cheap thrills can be very fun.The story has to do with the military performing crazy experiments on solders trying to create the "Ultimate Killing Machine". It starts out with a great solder being tortured and then being turned into a killer. The movie then goes on to a group of four outcasts that have been sent to the military to be reformed. They to are experimented on and accidentally let the first test subject out, who starts a wild killing spree.That is basically the storyline. As I said before, it is nothing new. It reminds me of a horrible mix of Alien and Wes Cravens Brain Ripper. This really is not a very good movie as the acting is mediocre, the story is lame, and the gore isn't even all that great. Michael Madson pulls in another fabulous performance, that similar of his performance in BloodRayne. It is funny seeing an actor who was great in movies like Reservoir Dogs and other movies similar, fall into such a rut.All around, this movie just doesn't cut it. But, if you have some time to kill, you might enjoy it. Just don't take it to seriously. 5/10

I know it's always a bad sign, these days, to see Michael Madsen starring a movie. Even though he has been - and perhaps in some ways still is - a decent actor, he's been making a lot of bad B-movies lately and surprisingly, this is even worse than BloodRayne. He has come far from the days of Reservoir Dogs and both Kill Bills, but apparently lacking the sense of staying far enough from movies like this.First of all, this movie has an identity problem. It's like a compilation of all those clichés you have seen in about every other movie, but only worse. The movie begins like any other cheap scifi horror flick, where people are tested against their will by the US Army and some ketchup gets sprayed on the walls as your regular monster gets loose for a moment. Then we go into a teen comedy, where four teens act like they do in every other teen movie, all so rebellious. Since these teens are all scum, yet in different ways, they get the privilege to carry on for the rest of the movie. They hate each other and the army, then they hate a bit more, after the evil experiments they get away, get couple of totally incompetent guards beaten up, and then they bond and fight each other, while those same incompetent guards get killed by the monster from the intro sequence, losing their heads and faces, while Mr Madsen tries to figure out what to do with the old, crazy nazi and the lovely nurse. Luckily all three get killed by the monster. In the end there is supposed to be an explosion, but since the budget was pretty close to twenty bucks in the beginning, there's not even any cheap CGI in the movie, but just a flash with couple of booms. Oh, forgot to mention about that one girl, who got shot in her forehead.This movie lacks all the logic and even all the suspension, as you can only watch with your jaws open and wonder if you are supposed to be laughing at or just frightened about all those horrible things you see on the screen. Yes, the acting is horrible, the properties seem to be made by a six-year old Chinese, and since there is no script, I can't see why there was an add-on romance in this movie. Maybe it was an accident.To make it short, if you want to spend some time doing something totally useless, watch this film. It will make you feel better about your real life, as escapism this bad is surely worse than anything one could ever face in the real world.

The Ultimate Killing Machine is about four kids that are recruited as test subjects into a secret army program that will change them into killing machines. The procedure involves stem cell treatments that enhance the physical attributes of the subjects making them very powerful and also horny. The kids aren't aware that they are test subjects until they start coming back from training with holes in the back of their necks. They figure it isn't such good training when one of the original test subjects breaks free and reeks havoc throughout the installation killing everything in sight except the kids at first. The ultimate battle takes place and the results need to be seen. Relatively good acting, sick script, good cinematography and directing.