The Beast in the Cellar (1970)

A very feeble attempt at affirmatie action

A Brilliant Conflict

I think this is a new genre that they're all sort of working their way through it and haven't got all the kinks worked out yet but it's a genre that works for me.

This movie tries so hard to be funny, yet it falls flat every time. Just another example of recycled ideas repackaged with women in an attempt to appeal to a certain audience.

This slow and talk-filled movie will be offputting to most genre fans who are expecting the pace of a Hammer movie or the grisliness of a Pete Walker film. It has neither, and instead seems to be more of a drawing-room drama, packed with dialogue and the minimum of action and actual horror content. This is a shame, as the murders (when they do occur) are executed well, and shown from the killer's point of view - kind of like the murders in LEGEND OF THE WEREWOLF. Although the film is not explicitly gruesome, the murders do get pretty bloody and two scenes involving a hanging eyeball have been inserted in to make things more grisly.The story is a rather simple one, yet director Kelley manages to wring maximum atmosphere from the location of his story - an isolated farmhouse is just right for a horror flick of this variety. Although obviously filmed on a limited budget, the realistic sets are good too, full of ominous shadows, which is a good thing because the entire film only takes place in a handful of locations. A suspenseful music score also helps to add to the atmosphere of the film.The main problem with the movie is the lack of horror content and the slow pacing, which makes it laborious even for patient viewers. While this isn't too much of a problem, it comes as a surprise due to the exploitation title which makes this sound like some exciting monster rampage movie when in fact it's not. The opening murders and a scene showing a loving couple being butchered in a barn fit in oddly with the scenes involving Robson and Reid.Perhaps these scenes go on for too long (one has Reid telling the whole story, which lasts about twenty minutes of her talking), but they're certainly interesting, if not exciting, to watch. The dialogue the two actresses are given helps to make their characters realistic and, if not exactly likable, then certainly understandable. Both are given clear personalities - Reid is the worrying, gentle one, while Robson is the colder, cunning one - and their interchange can sometimes be gripping in a subtle way. You really get to know these two by the end of the film, and it feels like you've invaded their lives. The supporting roles are obviously minor yet packed out with appealing actors and actresses. THE BEAST IN THE CELLAR is not a film for all tastes, mine somewhat included, but it's a well-handled curiosity.

The bad news: the Canadian version of Beast In The Cellar released by Maple Pictures that I saw was of poor quality. Dark and washed out, it appeared to be dubbed haphazardly from a VHS tape. It even skips at one point due to some missing frames.The good news: this movie is so bad that the poor quality of the DVD detracted little from my viewing enjoyment. This horror movie fails to build tension and lacks scares. It is a horrorless horror film. While most frightening films have limited dialog, Beast In The Cellar is a gabfest, so much so that a character will repeat something we have just heard said by two other characters. Presumably, all the chit chat acts as filler for a very low budget, unimaginative movie. Unfortunately, the dialog isn't campy enough to make it worth a watch.

Not half as bad as some make out and if as is said it went out on a double bill with 'Blood on Satan's Claw', I reckon that was pretty good value. This doesn't have the dolly birds and swinging London paraphernalia but instead two solid performances from Flora Robson and Beryl Reid more than compensates. The kills are surprisingly bloody, the situation with the two spinsters well done and although the final explanation is a bit wordy and prolonged but at least by the end we are still interested to know just who was the occupant of the cellar. Not as jolly as a lot of Tigon product and maybe the better for it for a change. More than a little creepy, not least for the way the old ladies seem, effortlessly to change roles, causing us to rethink what we reckon is going on.

A soldier walks alone in the ever darkening sunset. Suddenly he is attacked by a creature. You know this because the camera is shaken around, there is disjointed screaming, and the same photo of a bloody slash mark is subliminally flashed. This was obviously to avoid too much editing by the censor, but I immediately thought, "Great, a 1970's crap horror movie. Worth watching" Then the laid back, easy-listening trumpet title tune put the icing on the cake - more cocktail lounge than horror film it is immediately at odds with the theme of the film. After the intro, the usual chapter with the detectives investigating the incident scene. You don't actually see the body, but the contrived commentary by the detectives gives you a good idea of its condition. "Hmmmm, deep lacerations to the face and body made by talons, I'd say." You get the picture. This thorough off the cuff autopsy by the detectives gets them off on the wrong foot by making the assumption that it's a Panther.Apart perhaps from the two leading actresses and T P McKenna, there is little evidence of any real acting. The soldier that keeps an eye on the two old dears was probably a real soldier - he appeared to be reading from idiot boards such was his woodeness. However, the story does get a bit more involved and at times seems well written, so you shouldn't judge this film by the first amusing half hour.