Universal Soldiers (2007)

It is a performances centric movie

Absolutely amazing

When a movie has you begging for it to end not even half way through it's pure crap. We've all seen this movie and this characters millions of times, nothing new in it. Don't waste your time.

The plot isn't so bad, but the pace of storytelling is too slow which makes people bored. Certain moments are so obvious and unnecessary for the main plot. I would've fast-forwarded those moments if it was an online streaming. The ending looks like implying a sequel, not sure if this movie will get one

As the summary indicates, this is one film I urge people to watch for 2 main reasons. Reason number 1: You will learn to appreciate good movies all the more. Reason number 2: If you can get past the fact that all involved in the making of this film are acting like it's a really serious production, it will be rather funny. Truly, if this was made as a comedy it would have been hysterical! On the downside, the sound is obscured by the ambient sounds of nature as well as their uniforms, which constantly seem to scrape the microphones, causing an unnecessary amount of painful noises. The acting is way over the top. The story is full of holes, although watching the behind the scenes featurette may fill a few in. Improper weapons handling throughout the entire movie. Obvious finger marks on some of the makeup. The Private yells at her superiors quite a lot with no repercussions, and an assortment of other terrors.It's a really awful movie, but I do have a good laugh when I watch it.

For those that think that the Asylum only puts out crappy Z-rated excruciatingly bad horror films, like such stinkers as "Halloween Night", "Massacre at Cutter's Cove", and "Snakes on a Train", you'd be dead wrong as they also put out crappy Z-rated excruciatingly bad sci-fi films like this one. Despite the title, this has absolutely NO relation to the Universal Soldier films, and owes much much to Predator and terminator (not to tarnish either of those two classics by comparison trust me). Anyways in this putrid little number, a group of the most highly ineffectual members of the military since "Hills have Eyes 2" are stalked by the lamest looking Borg-wanna be cyborgs that I've ever seen. Most of the film the enemy is off-screen, substituted by lame-ass predator-vision so it relies on the characters whom are all cliché boring cardboard cutouts that you truly don't care if they live or die. The ending in particular is so laughably atrocious that one can't help but feel their brain liquefying just by viewing it.My Grade: F

I am glad it was a free rental. I was half tempted to scratch the disc to spare the next poor sap 86 mins of his life. I mean seriously, this was crap. I have seen better film student films and much better (ok not MUCH better) films from indie filmmakers in Florida.So I guess this film is Universal in one thing...it sucks!I could just repeat most of what Alkaly from the UK said, but it was all so true. To rehash, the fairly average chicks in the movie didn't even get naked. Oh and the second (the first would be the movie was filmed) most annoying thing was the soundtrack. It sounded like they used a digital answering machine to record the voices.I shouldn't even waste more time writing a review of this movie, but it was that bad I had to clear my conscience and let people know.

This is the worst movie I have ever seen. I would not even call it a movie. I don't know how it is possible to release such kind of terrible crap. I wanted to give 0 points but there is no such thing, unfortunately. The basic story would be OK, but the whole move does not worth a dime. Directing is extremely poor, actors ... I would not even call them actors, special effects very lame and the whole things was... well I don't know what to write 10 lines regarding this movie, it was SOB A D !!!TERRIBLE!Do not ever watch it!