Malibu Shark Attack (2009)

Just perfect...

The movie's neither hopeful in contrived ways, nor hopeless in different contrived ways. Somehow it manages to be wonderful

A great movie, one of the best of this year. There was a bit of confusion at one point in the plot, but nothing serious.

There's a more than satisfactory amount of boom-boom in the movie's trim running time.

This is by far one of the worst things I've ever witnessed that's called a movie. SyFy makes some bad stuff, but this is the (sour) cream of their crop. The writing is just awful; the worst yet. The characters' acting is blatantly forced and fake. And of course, as in all of SyFy's films, there is some egregious use of sex in the form of half-nude women, who have no reason to be so scantily clad. These girls have no place in these films other than to keep your eyes fixed to the screen for another moment. I enjoy seeing beautiful women, but not in this way; it's disgusting and sad.As for the sharks themselves, they've gone wild on this idea that Goblin Sharks--which are real sharks which live very deep in the real ocean-- are these enormous human-eating predatory fish which roar like lions. This is at least the third or fourth SyFy shark-film I've seen now in which the sharks roar like lions. Sharks don't have vocal chords, so they can't make noises like that. Even giving them the license of this being a creative science-fiction film, it still doesn't fit. None of it does. To make things especially worse and adding insult to injury (on the audience's part), the CGI sharks are just awful-looking; not believable, scary, or anything bordering on entertaining in the least bit. The sharks move so unnaturally, and look as if they were put together on a lazy afternoon by someone who was just learning the ropes on how to make computer-generated images.This film is just terrible. It's not even one of those type of movies that's so bad it's funny type of affairs. This is everything that's wrong with TV & film these days wrapped into a 90ish minute package. Avoid this crap like the plague!

I totally blame the SyFy channel (where I watched this wonderful cinematic masterpiece this afternoon....after 3 others that numbed my brain....) 'Shark Week' doesn't even start for a couple more weeks, and they already have me hooked! Let's be real: as a movie, this one SUCKS. But pop some popcorn, pick up some (really strong) adult beverages, and just enjoy the train wreck that is "Malibu Shark Attack".SPOILER ALERT: not sure why it took 1/2-hour for the tsunami to (finally) hit...(and did not appreciate the 'newscaster's comparison to the REAL tsunami that hit Indonesia in 2004). But the horribly-fake computer-generated tsunami appears well after the horribly-fake computer-generated "sharks". The heroes, stuck in one hell of a sturdy lifeguard shack, make you root for the sharks -- from the bleach-blonde teen bimbo to the newly-engaged couple who have NO chemistry. At all. Horribly fake CPR...horribly fake "stitches".... They even use horribly fake "Jaws"-esque music. AND I COULDN'T TURN THE STUPID MOVIE OFF.

So I'm watching Malibu Shark Attack as I'm typing this up, I was so irritated by the fact that Goblin Sharks are indeed REAL, that I had to make an account on this site just to tell you how horrendous this movie is. Not only is the CGI, acting, and script complete crap but they give you false facts about an existing shark. Seriously if you wanted to make up stuff you might as well had gone the extra mile to design a fake shark too.A Goblin Shark is in fact real, it lives in the deep oceans and was discovered off the shores of Japan. This creature is only rare due to the depths it lives at, the Goblin Shark isn't even considered endangered! The snout in the movie is far too short, its skin color should be pinkish and not gray unless It's dead. The reality of the situation is null. Another lousy Syfy attempt at creating the new "Jaws" but honestly we would have been much better off if it wasn't even made.If you enjoy disappointment then this movie is just what you're looking for.

I gave this film a six out of ten simply because it really isn't a good movie, although, it is highly entertaining. This is the type of movie that used to keep me from changing the channel.Syfy (formerly Sci-fi Channel) used to show 90% - 95% science fiction, with IMO about 1/2 of the programming being fairly good shows and the other half being cheesy, goofy, and really not that good, but still all very entertaining. They have since outweighed their science fiction shows and movies with Syfy Original reality TV programming. This has cause me to change channels, and often avoid Syfy for days while nothing but reality TV programming and early morning infomercials dominate several days of each week. My TV used to be locked on Syfy, only changing to other channels for a few hours each week to watch some of my favorite new shows on other networks, like Fringe, Smallville, Heroes, and a few others here and there, but I would always return the channel to Syfy when those other shows were over.Movies like this one, "Malibu Shark Attack" are great to have on while working from home, surfing the Internet, and doing other things that take attention away from the TV show that is on. I can't count the number of times I've either missed a good show and been upset for this same reason, or failed to get something done that was important because I was watching something really good on TV. Having movies like this on, which is why I used to love Syfy, is a gift. I can watch it and be entertained if I'd like or have it on in the background and get something done (like this review I'm writing right now as this movie is showing - I've seen it at least twice already) knowing that it will show again within several weeks.A movie doesn't have to be great to be worth watching. This movie is, as I say again, entertaining. I would rather watch this, and movies of this quality (or lack thereof if you prefer) and be entertained than watch reality TV programming about anything, and that's what is taking over Syfy and much of television today. If you don't have to see a great movie and want something entertaining, good enough to hold your attention if you'd like, and has decent (or at least fun) effects, this movie is for you. Someone mentioned in one of these review that they don't know where Malibu is located. I don't live far from Malibu, which is in one of the most well known counties and states in the country, so for those few who haven't heard of landslides in Malibu, oceanfront property, celebrities who live in Malibu, or one of many other references to Malibu, I'll throw you one bone - Pacific Coast Highway runs through it. If you still don't know, look it up. You're on the Internet, so Google it! In any event, enjoy "Malibu Shark Attack!"