Bikini a Go Go (2004)

The greatest movie ever made..!

Not even bad in a good way

As somebody who had not heard any of this before, it became a curious phenomenon to sit and watch a film and slowly have the realities begin to click into place.

A clunky actioner with a handful of cool moments.

A brilliant and masterful film superbly crafted by stunningly brilliant director Fred Olen Ray. The cinematography will leave all but the most jaded film buffs breathless at every turn. The actors turn in performances that are surprisingly reminiscent of Dustin Hoffman and Meryl Streep in terms of both range and depth of character development. The several intricate plot twists develop along the lines of a dialectic between modern anarcho-nihilism and traditional teleology, culminating in a final scene that moved me like nothing since "Requiem for a Dream." Nah, just kidding. It's pretty much porn. Naming the main characters (?) Brad and Janet, no doubt after the starring roles of "The Rocky Horror Picture Show," is a sort of a nice touch... I guess...But yeah, it's porn.

Retromedia was firing on all cylinders with this one. This is a great cross between 1950's horror schlock parody and 21st century late night cable soft core. Brad's bikini shop mistakenly receives a tiki necklace that he decides to give to his girlfriend Janet (Beverly Lynne). When she wears the necklace though, she becomes so sex crazed that she has to jump whatever's readily available, be it male, female or herself. The intended recipients of the necklace want it back though because it's crucial to their plans to take over the world. I have no idea how they were planning on doing this though since its only power ever displayed is the one that I mentioned above.There are seven sex scenes. Four are boy/girl, one is girl/girl, one is girl/girl/girl, and one is girl solo. All of them are of the quality that Retromedia usually delivers... good and explicit. In addition to Beverly, the cast includes Stacy Burke, Cailey Taylor, and Nikki Fritz.I recommend this one.

Brad gives Janet a tiki necklace that turns who into a raging slut. Darvella is the rightful owner who wants it back. There's two types of soft-core films. Those that pump up the music during the sex scenes to drown out the moans and those that let the moans be heard. Thankfully, this flick is one of the latter and not the former. However, this is offset a bit by a black and white Narroter pausing the film at regular intervals for 'comedic effect' Whenever aftercare films attempt humor it's more often then not painful. Good for a latter day Fred Olen Ray film, but that's really not saying much.My Grade: C The Goods: 7 Sex scenes (F/F, M/F, Solo, F/F/F) Babe of the Movie: Beverly Lynn because hers is the only real chest, and I remember seeing her as a cheerleader when I went to Eagles games back in the dayWhere I saw it: Cinemax on demand

*SPOILER ALERT* *SPOILER ALERT*I was drifting away from consciousness one night when this movie popped up on cable. I had taken a sleeping pill about a half hour earlier and was starting to feel groggy. I knew if I committed to this movie, I was going to mess up my well laid sleeping plans for the night. Speaking of well laid, one of the first scenes has two blondes having sex in a dressing room. I knew what had to be done. Screw the sleeping pill! -"Bikini a Go Go" is on!A frigid woman gets her hands on an erotic Tiki doll. When she wears it, people have sex. The cast all take a tumble with the Tiki. Nikki Fritz shows up and wants the Tiki doll for her collection. She has Tiki sex and the viewer rejoices."Bikini a Go Go" is a good softcore adventure. Fritz and company wrangle over the Tiki doll to see who can get naked the most times. "Bikini a Go Go" should be seen. It strips down a lot on late night cable. Don't worry if you've taken a sleeping pill or any other substance. Pry your eyes open, drink some coffee and roll with the nympho Tiki love drug.