Pleasurecraft (1999)

Tied for the best movie I have ever seen

Such a frustrating disappointment

The movie's neither hopeful in contrived ways, nor hopeless in different contrived ways. Somehow it manages to be wonderful

It’s fine. It's literally the definition of a fine movie. You’ve seen it before, you know every beat and outcome before the characters even do. Only question is how much escapism you’re looking for.

This movie was probably one of the worst movies I've ever seen. The "special effects" were cheesy and lame, reminiscent of early 90's Power Rangers. It doesn't do much as a porn either. Who watches softcore porn anyway??? Especially at the level of Pleasurecraft. Other movies have way better sex scenes and they're not even considered porn. If you wanna watch porn,watch porn, DO NOT WATCH PLEASURECRAFT.The dialogue was lame, too. There wasn't anything funny about the film. At least Orgy of the Dead had lines like, "More gooold!" Pleasurecraft didn't have anything funny or sexy. and one girl was but ugly, that one who slept with the flying guy, who was "intelligent".

*SPOILER ALERT* *SPOILER ALERT* A four man crew and their handy android are transporting a mysterious cargo through space. The captain has to keep the contents secret or else his crew will go wild. When an alien spaceship tries to destroy them for their cargo, the captain has to go check it out himself. Well what do you know? It consists of three hot women. That's some good cargo. The crew is supposed to bring the women to an ambassador as some sort of "brides to be" peace offering but the men, and their hot cargo, have other ideas."Pleasurecraft" is a typical Surrender cinema sex adventure. Lots of soft-core sex in a sci-fi setting. Typical. This one actually tried to have a little bit more sci-fi than sex. What's up with that? There is actually a drawn out space ship attack. "Their shields are too powerful!" and "Beam aboard a torpedo!" etc. It was exciting stuff. But not as exciting as the three-way between the hot women! Actually, that scene wasn't that great. "Pleasurecraft" was kind of ho-hum. The best scene had one of the alien chicks and a crew member rolling around near a river. Other than that, it wasn't too exciting. However I did like the short blonde leader of the pack. Brandy Davis is hot stuff. One scene had her posing for the captain in some sort of virtual reality chamber as a cheerleader and other male fantasies. That was nice of her. Alien women know how to please.

Interesting to note that the reviewers have commented at some length on the beauty of the actresses involved . Yes they certainly are attractive but even in soft core terms ( And we`re speaking very soft core here ) the acting is very wooden . Not only that but it features probably the most unconvincing love making scenes I`ve ever seen in these type of films , or indeed any type of film. Compare the sex scenes seen here with those seen in RITA SUE AND BOB TOO or BASIC INSTINCT and tell me what`s the more convincing sex scene

I've seen this movie three times, and every time I've seen it....it leaves me scratching my head.You see, a ship full of sex starved space dudes (and one android) pick up these three gorgeous women who are being shipped as "cargo" to another planet to squash a potential war.For those of you who stopped after the word "women", that's where the movie should have stopped also. Unfortunately, it spends most of the 90-odd minutes elaborating on the stuff after "women".There's way too much "technical" dialogue for this to be a true skin flick; sure, the women are hot and yes, the crew all gets their turn with them (excluding the android, who seemingly has no feeling toward them), case in point:Hot space babe kisses the android guy.Hot babe: Hmm, that's strange. Most men desire our kisses. Android guy: Like I said, I'm not like most men.Hmph.Did I mention Taimie Hannum is in this?? Well, now I did.I was hoping for Dinosaur Island in Outer Space, but instead I'm left with....Beach Babes From Beyond. It's hard to say whether "Pleasurecraft" wants to be a "Star Trek" parody or a down-and-dirty, late-night softcore skin flick. There's a cameo appearance by the ever-so-curvy Shayna Ryan in one of the captains dream sequences....great stuff there. Other than that, try to tune out the space jargon and concentrate on the acres of naked flesh you're gonna see.