Nightmare Weekend (1986)

Sadly Over-hyped

Let's be realistic.

Good concept, poorly executed.

Don't listen to the negative reviews

As an individual with an interest in B-movies, a person who has watched The Star Wars Holiday Special and The Room more than 10 times each, I must say that this movie is the longest, most trying experience I have ever had. Characters are hardly fleshed out & the plot rolls along excruciatingly slowly (not to mention the fact that half of the plot is typical romance fodder.)This creates a certain sensation I feel while watching this movie, a sensation that, hilariously, I can actually deem an effective explanation for.See, if you're like me, you don't really mind how "bad" a movie is; you're merely looking for something that will keep you intrigued/amused, whether it's "good" or "bad." I love The Star Wars Holiday Special; there are multiple moments where the 'So bad it's good / What the hell were they thinking??' aesthetic applies wonderfully. I'd compare it, and perhaps other B-movies, to, say, a musical act like GG Allin; so totally over-the-top and obnoxious that you simply cannot look away.This bandwidth being established, watching this movie from start to finish without the aid of alcohol is similar in nature to listening to Metallica's collaboration with Lou Reed, "Lulu." This movie is like "Lulu" in several ways: It's way, way too long given its content, it's set up absolutely terribly, there are very few moments where you are driven to care about what you're experiencing on any level, etcetera, etcetera, etcetera.This isn't to say that you're going to be experiencing some decent-to- great (I wouldn't even call it excellent, honestly) unintentional humor, you're just gonna have to go through a long, painful experience to get any of it, and if you actually care about the story, then trust me, you're gonna have to go through an even longer painful experience.In conclusion, If you're like me, even after reading this review, you're gonna be grabbing this movie to see how terrible it truly is. I hope that, as a person who loves the Star Wars Holiday Special, I've effectively explained the level of 'awful' you're putting yourself up against. If, even then, you're still going to be watching this film, then I commend you for your bravery, and beg you to prepare yourself with the only advice I can offer you; Alcohol may help (I wasn't fortunate enough to have any laying around at the time of my viewing.)This movie is the only one that's ever caused me to literally stop the movie, look at the clock, and state out loud, "How far am I into this piece of ****?"

I must have seen the VHS box for this a million times in a million different video stores and always passed it up. It wasn't until this last week when I got an email from a friend describing this as an absolutely mind blowing WTF-fest that I finally decided to check this out. And how glad I am - this is the dopey kind of misguided flick that I live for.Let's see if I can make this plot make sense - scientist Edward Brake (Wellington Meffert) has developed a behavior modification computer system called APACHE which takes a personal item of the subject, turns it into a silver ball and then shoots that ball into their mouth. Somehow that makes people change and is a scientific breakthrough. What Brake doesn't count on is his assistant Julie (Debbie Laster) conducting experiments on three college girls for a mysterious backer. And what Julie does count on is Brake's daughter Jessica (Debra Hunter) falling in love with Julie's assistant Ken (Dale Midkiff). Or Jessica having a super high-tech computer named "George" (which has an accessory of a talking puppet!?!) that can prevent Jessica from being harmed. From beginning to end, this is one oddball flick. It has everything 80s (aerobics, walkmen, roller skates, leg warmers, Coke, pinball) and more. Feast your eyes up the scene where a biker makes out with his chick in front of a bar while playing pinball. Or the couple who make out in the back of a limo as the driver changes the tire and some random dude in the woods bops to music on his walkman. Or the chauffeur who disguises his drinking by placing his mini-bottles between two slices of bread. Or a guy being attacked by some silk panties! And that mystery man shown through out the flick? We never find out who he is!If I didn't know any better, I'd swear this was an 80s Italian flick shot in Florida - weird dubbing, odd delivery, everything so slightly off balance and with hint of not knowing how Americans really act. But the credits betray me and it looks like real Americans made it. The end credits list it as a co-production between England, France and the US. The director is credited on screen as H. Sala and the IMDb says he is one Henry Sala. Either that is a pseudonym or he bowed out after his masterpiece. The producer is listed as one Bachoo Sen (gesundheit!). I have to know more about who made this. Another amazing aspect of this movie is the cast. Low budget flicks often feature a future star here and there, but this one features three future mainstream stars - Dale Midkiff, Andrea Thompson (NYPD BLUE) and Robert John Burke. WHAT!?! Was this flick some kind of Faustian porthole? Everyone else in the cast and crew were one and done.

I was the on-line producer of "Nightmare Weekend" and was responsible for casting it. I have to agree that "Nightmare Weekend" may be the worst movie made of all time. The very fact that it has been considered for this category should speak volumes. However, while there is truth that this film was made for a direct-to-video release as was popular in the 80s, the film started with good intentions and a decent script. The problems arose when the co-executive producers, (all from France and England) who were supposed to put up their 50% of the $750,000 budget decided that in lieu of $, they would provide a script (horrible - written in French), a director (whose only credits I was told were porno pix out of Thailand, a film crew (again, all from France) and some equipment. We never got our money's worth. When we (I represented the American contingent) looked at the script, I hired a new writer (American) to re-write the entire thing. However, when we finally arrived on location in Ocala, Florida to begin shooting, the French writer had once-again re-written the entire film on instructions from the co-executive producer, an Indian chap named Bachoo Senn from India/London. It was a joke but once on location, there was little we could do.All the young actors and actresses were having sex with one another (not that we cared). The acting was appalling, although I did take great pride in casting Dale Midkiff and Andrea Thompson, both of whom went on to somewhat successful careers. I gave up my dreams of the film business (having obtained my BA in film from Univ. Miami, Fla.) and now find the entire event amusing. I currently practice law on Wall Street. The only good thing to come out of that film was my daughter (now 19) who was conceived on location. Hope this clears things up for some readers.By the way, I played the gas station attendant only because they needed someone and I happened to be there! Perhaps I stole the show.

The acting in this movie stinks. The plot makes very little sense, but from what I gathered it's supposed to be about this scientist who develops the ability to turn people's personal items into tiny steel balls that then fly into their mouths and turn them into zombies (or blow their heads up, whichever). And the effects are lousy, too. Most of the movie consists of bad music, with the actors dancing equally as badly to the bad music, interspersed with multiple boring sex scenes. This should be one of the worst things ever made, but for one thing. One element of shear brilliance that makes "Nightmare Weekend" stand above all others. And that special quality is the presence of George.George is the lovable interface device between the scientist's daughter, Jessica, and the home computer security system. With his green hair and nose, balding scalp, and heart-shaped mouth, George is the guardian angel/confidant to Jessica, who asks him for advice on how to meet guys in one of the most dramatic pieces of dialogue ever captured on celluloid. With his monotone synthesized voice, George tells Jessica what percentages of males prefer women in white dresses, and also that hitch-hiking is the third best way to meet guys after discos and bars. Of course, little Jessica just can't seem to stay out of trouble, causing George to execute "Emergency Program Code: Protection Jessica", which results in the violent death of Jessica's would-be assailant via one of the aforementioned steel balls.Kubrick was an utter fool for thinking he could give a computer personality using closeups of a red light. HAL should have been represented by our friend George in order to better translate compassion for his eventual demise. The light and sound show at the end of "Close Encounters"? Not bad, but how much better would that movie had been if the means of first communication with the aliens had been George the Hand Puppet. Bishop, Data, R2 – kitchen appliances next to the Almighty George! He might only be in the movie for 8 minutes out of 90, but don't be fooled. This show is all about George. With even that limited amount of screentime, George joins the ranks of such luminous film characters as Hollywood Montrose, Majai, and Pappy from "New Moon Rising" as icons of American cinema. "George to Apache" – you are my hero.