Witches of the Caribbean (2005)

Purely Joyful Movie!

Far from Perfect, Far from Terrible

A movie that not only functions as a solid scarefest but a razor-sharp satire.

The film's masterful storytelling did its job. The message was clear. No need to overdo.

OK, this film probably deserves a 3 out of 10, but I gave it two extra points for Nicole Cavazos, who is a genuine dark-haired beauty with a great smile and figure. The locations are also pleasant. And the first half of the movie holds some promise, as you don't know exactly what is happening or where the evil comes from. Unfortunately, it all becomes a muddle by the end, with reincarnated characters that were bad in their past life turning good ("I will destroy you now like I destroyed you then"; ehm, but you didn't destroy her then, you were her accomplice!) and a silly "it was just a bad dream"-type ending. Another indication of the poorness of the script is the fact that the movie runs about 80 minutes, 5 of which are taken by the closing credits, and another 10 of which are just re-played scenes! As I said, try it for Nicole only.

Being wiccan myself I somewhat look forward to good witch movies and to say the least this was pure crap. If I'd known this was a weak independent movie with almost no budget I would have passed on it. As seeing as the title caught my attention I decided to give it a try.The acting was horrible and you can almost smell the director attempt to pull off the "hot Gothic witch" vibe from The Craft during the beach walk scene that ended up ( like the last reviewer said) a 5 min music video of them walking across the beach. Not to mention the lead witch was breath-taking UGLY! I have so many bad things to say about this movie, and the ending didn't make a lick of sense. All I have to say, if you are looking for a good horror flick this isn't it. Don't watch it on TV, don't even rent it from netflick ( like I did), its is just really bad.

'witchcraft with the power to induce sleep; film-making that makes you want to claw out your eyes'. Just wanted to quote that remark. This movie is a true horror. In this case, that's not a compliment. Horrible special effects and talentless actresses/actors. Every horror movie has its innocent victims. In this case, the innocent victims aren't on screen. They are the ones watching this crap(a.k.a 'the innocent viewer'). It's almost like a cheap porn movie, with all the good parts cut out. So, here's what I'm trying to say. Don't expect anything from this piece of crap, don't waste any money on it. You should only go and watch it in a drugged sort of state or if you're in a particularly humorous mood.

I normally enjoy a movie in this genre, even if the quality lacks a little (like it usually does). But as B-movies come and go, you need to further down the alphabet to classify this one.The script, choreography, acting look like they've been directed by a teenager, one without a lot of talent. Where to start... silly scene transitions, people walking into the viewer and out of it after they delivered their lines which makes it look like a kindergarten stage play, lame special fx and flashbacks/reminders that are disturbing if you consider the level of intelligence they must have been aimed at. But it's not quite bad enough to be funny either.The term 'spoilers' does not apply for this movie: you should avoid it like the plague.