Birdemic: Shock and Terror (2010)

Perfect cast and a good story

A very feeble attempt at affirmatie action

A Masterpiece!

I wanted to like it more than I actually did... But much of the humor totally escaped me and I walked out only mildly impressed.

SPOILER: This movie is sincemtatic masterpiece that it achieves all poiints in movie art adn i think that this movie is theone of the classics and cult hjits of this decade in fact i think that everyone should atleast s ee it once and i think maybe they get a new point of view of birds and global wamrnig?? anyways i cried when the birds tatacked athe scity :((( but that was a given since this movie is filled with plot twist and whioops that is spoiler hahaha. overall, solid movie would watch again and again like the sequel. :v

This movie is plenty of WTF moments. It starts with a too long scene of our hero driving his Mustang while the camera is just hanging carelessly, giving us a weird angle. Then it is followed by a scene where our heroin Nathalie says "hi" without even moving her lips.Fast forward almost 40 minutes of a boring, intrascendent subplot about sex, pumpkins and a nonsensical deal. Our heros are trapped on a cheap motel (despite Rod being a millionaire) when all of a sudden and out of the blue, birds start attacking and exploding. What do they do? Grab some coat hangers as weapons and run to a van.After some minutes of annoying chirping sounds and random events, our heros stop by some pullover cars. They find a girl (Susan) hiding below a car and a boy (Tony) trapped in a trunk. Now, why is this kid trapped there? I remember being a kid, and I'll never choose a trunk that cannot be opened from inside as a temporary shelter against angry birds.Cut to all our friends riding in the van. The kids are in the back seats, and we assume they're mourning the losses of their fathers. Right? Well, not quite. They are timid at first, but soon we can see Tony holding a handheld videogame of sorts, and sharing it with Susan. So much for kids that just lost their parents. And, how they knew the name of the boy? In the movie, they don't ask.Now our heros are pulling over to take some water and food. Birds appear high in the sky, chirping. Our heros go back to the van and leave. But where's Becky?A cowboy appears after our friends decide it's time to buy some gas (seriously, who stays in a gas station when outside there's a bird apocalypse?). He demands to buy some gas (when he clearly can just steal it, as he got a gun). That cowboy receives an insta-karma from the birds, but what our hero do? He leaves both the gun and the gas canister on the side of the road, when he clearly can pick both items up.After all this nonsense, my brain hurts. The only thing that I remember is our group arriving at a coast to watch how the birds are flying away into the open sea.This entire movie is just a bunch of events put together without any criteria. I feel sorry for the kids; they were part of such an awful thing, their careers are ruined forever.

Returning to his small-town home, a man finds his attempted romance with a local model interrupted by a series of attacks carried out by swarms of killer birds attacking anything that moves and must not only get themselves but the other survivors of their town to safety.Frankly, this one really is that bad. About the only thing enjoyable with this one is the fact that there's a lot of bird encounters in the last half which really generates a modicum of excitement compared to the bland beginning. From the attack at the motel to the gunfight with the creatures trying to get away and the later sequences on the beach-side picnic area which has a bit of action thrown in to raise this one up slightly. With these providing the film with some decent gore effects for the aftermath of their attacks, these here are the film's positives as it does have many factors that bring it down. The main issue here is the absolutely atrocious bargain-basement level CGI that passes as acceptable in the film. The attacks are laughable in how inept they appear due to the work in here, as the birds not only look completely inorganic and nowhere close to interacting within their environment that just makes for a frustrating watch. These creatures perform the most rudimentary actions possible and seems to think that passes for horrific attacks here as they seemingly hover around the location placed on-screen in a random manner which really turns these into being silly rather than scary as this occurs for every single one of these action scenes. Likewise, the other big issue with this one is the atrocious pacing on display here which really does hamper this one considerably. There are way too many scenes of this one being dragged out with extra moments that do nothing for the film as a whole. It's not that important to witness every step of his journey into work from taking the freeway to the side-streets and walking to his desk or his date with her at the restaurant that goes on forever which really struggles to make this one become interesting at the very beginning. As well, there's also plenty of useless scenes inserted simply to add more time to the film as the boardroom meeting showing everyone individually applauding or trying to place all the useless environmental messages that are shoehorned into the film with the subtlety of a sledgehammer, and together these elements really hold back the action to the last half of the film and rarely gives this any kind of enjoyment whatsoever. The other big flaw is the lack of reasoning or rationale for anything that happens, from the start of the bird attacks to why items in their possession continually appear or reappear or why the film follows the same general storyline that makes it predictable. These here really do lower this one so significantly that it's just as awful as its reputation suggests.Rated R: Violence and Language.

Tl;dr : no.As someone who has written a couple of reviews in the past, I'm at a loss at how to start on this review. I'm typing this extremely, extremely slowly, just searching for a way to approach this. I guess I had better start with the most prominent feature of the film.Alan Bagh. I act as a hobby, and I've seen my fair share of terrible actors. But Alan Bagh is worse than the worst actor I've ever seen. Ever. Not just on screen - he's worse than the kid who played the innkeeper in my school Christmas play when I was 5 (his only line was 'No. Goodnight,' and he forgot it). He puts Tommy Wiseau to shame. Whitney Moore is slightly better, but not by much - the most realistic thing about her is that she plays a model for Victoria's secret. I don't even want to talk about James Nguyen, the 'director' and 'writer'. But James, if you're reading this, I want you to know: You're a sick, depraved man. This film has shattered my faith in the art of film-making. I wish I was exaggerating. I wish this was just some joke, but it's not. I think the scariest bit about the film is that... everyone was trying their best. This was the best James Nguyen could do. His best shot. Alan Bagh wasn't acting like that because he was joking. He was acting like that because that's what he thought acting was like. And at the end of the day, they all patted themselves on the back, and congratulated each other on a good day's work. Just let that sink in.Sure, the first 30 minutes are funny. But it slowly turns sour, as you just watch your faith in humanity crumble before your eyes. It's like getting drunk with friends - at first, it's all laughs and in good spirit, but slowly over time it turns into something which threatens your entire wellbeing and the wellbeing of everyone you love. That's what it's like watching Birdemic. At the end of the day, it'll never reach the same cult status as The Room, because while The Room is some semi-playful BDSM, this is like someone holding a blowtorch to your balls. I'm giving this a 1/10 officially, but right after this, I'm going to email IMDb and ask them to put a 0/10 rating in place. Because what was the one point for? What in this film warranted the point? Where was the part of the film where I though 'yeah, this deserves a point'? I'm going to take a nice long shower and have a bit of a cry, now. I'm done.0/10