The Forest (1982)

What a waste of my time!!!

Plot so thin, it passes unnoticed.

A clunky actioner with a handful of cool moments.

I think this is a new genre that they're all sort of working their way through it and haven't got all the kinks worked out yet but it's a genre that works for me.

The movie starts with a pair of campers, a man and a woman presumably together, hiking alone in the vast wilderness. Sure enough the man hears something and it pangs him so much he goes to investigate it. Our killer greets him with a stab to the stomach. He then chases the girl and slashes her throat. The camera during the opening scene is from the point of view as the killer.We next meet our four main characters, two couples, one in which is on the rocks. The men joke about how the woman would never be able to handle camping alone at a double date, sparking the token blonde's ambition to leave a week early. Unexpectedly, the men leave the same day and their car breaks down.. They end up arriving in the evening. When the men arrive, they are warned about people disappearing in the forest by a crazy Ralph doppleganger. They ignore the warning and venture into the blackening night and an eighties song plays in the background with lyrics about being murdered in the dark forest. The men get lost.In the next scene we realize that this isn't just another The Burning clone, but a ghost story! The women, scared and lonely are huddling together by the fire. Two children appear in the shadows and decide to play peeping Tom. Well they are obviously ghosts by the way their voices echo! Their mother appears with blood dripping from a hole in her forehead and asks the two ladies if they've seen her children, before disappearing of course. The children run home to papa and tell him about the two beautiful ladies by the river. This causes quite a stir and he gets up, grabbing his knife from atop the fireplace. "Daddy's going hunting," The little girl, exclaims with bad acting. It is apparent here, that the dad isn't a ghost like his children.Freaked out by something in the woods, the token blonde splits, running blindly into the night, carrying a knife. She encounters the father who explains he's starving and it will be quick. This doesn't make sense because of the panther growls we heard earlier (Maybe he's allergic! Are panthers honestly even in California?) She ends up wounding him slightly before getting stabbed in the head. A thunderstorm erupts and the men seek shelter, which turns out to be where papa resides. Clearly someone lives here because there's a fire and something weird is roasting over it. The children appear and warn them of papa, who shows up moments later. They disappear as soon as he arrives.For whatever reason, our killer only goes after females. He invites the men to have something to eat and tells us the story about his ex wife. We are given a flashback of his wife getting caught cheating. The old man doesn't tell them however that he kills her and her lover afterwards, but daydreams about it. We aren't given the reason for the children's demise. The men go to sleep and are left unharmed. The next morning the men discover the empty campground of their wives. After a brief discussion they split up. One is to stay at the campsite, while the other goes and gets help. The one that is going back to his car breaks his leg. We are then reunited with the children as they explain to the surviving woman that they are ghosts who killed themselves from being sad about their mother. They agree to help the woman reunite with her friendsThe following scene defies the logic of the movie when papa kills the guy waiting at the campsite. He was also dating or married to the blonde. Somehow the children realize he is murdered and tell the woman about it. She decides to see it for herself and obviously runs into the killer. Luckily the children make him stop by threatening to leave him forever. You know where this is going.Overall the movie deserves four stars out of ten, and that's being generous. For all its misgivings, the musical score is well done. It's still watchable too. There are some camera angles that look professional, and some of the sets are done well. The plot is unbelievable. There is such a thing as willing suspension of disbelief, but with the toad 6 miles away; I can't imagine the token blonde would take off like that in the middle of the night. I mean, come on!Alan "Skip" Bannacheck

Let me begin by letting you know I am a fan of "B" Horror of the 60's/70's/early 80's. I love the bad acting, unintentional humor and low budgets of this genre.I am surprised I only recently found out about this film, I have now watched it 5 times in the past 2 weeks, I love it so much. The cannibal is so calm and laid-back, it's almost relaxing watching this movie. The flashback/fight scene is legendary. I also love it when the husband weeps like a baby. The theme song, "Dark Side of The Forest" is a gem! There is so much entertainment packed into this movie...I recommend it HIGHLY to my fellow fans of "bad" horror classics! ENJOY!

Hot-tempered macho jerk Charlie (the extremely annoying John Batis) and his more amiable easygoing buddy Steve (likable Dean Russsell) go hiking in a remote forest. Their wives Sharon (pretty brunette Tomi Barrett) and Teddi (lovely blonde Ann Wilkinson) also go camping in the same exact woodland area. They not only run afoul of crazed cannibal hermit John (well played by burly B-flick perennial Gary Kent), but also encounter the ghosts of his slain adulterous wife (a memorably bitchy Jeanette Kelly) and his children Jennifer (cute Becki Burke) and John, Jr. (future "Silver Spoons" TV sitcom regular Corky Pigeon). Competently directed by Don Jones (who has a small role as a friendly forest ranger), with solid acting from a capable cast, a deliciously cheesy flesh-crawling synthesizer score by Richard Hieronymus and Alan Oldfield, nice dollops of ghastly gore, rough, grainy, but pretty polished cinematography by Stuart Asbjorsen, a steady pace, a good deal of tension (the opening murder set piece is especially strong and suspenseful), several corny soft-rock songs occasionally blaring away on the soundtrack, engaging well-drawn characters, an eerie tone (the offbeat and inspired supernatural element greatly adds to the overall creepiness), and stark and unflinching outbursts of raw violence, this film does the trick as a really enjoyable backwoods horror item. Familiar character actor Stafford ("Cleopatra Jones," "The Alpha Incident") Morgan briefly appears as one of John's victims. Fans of slice'n'dice body count movies should probably dig this one a lot.

"The Forest" is a decent enough entry, if only for a few really interesting moments.**SPOILERS**Trying to relax, Steve, (Dean Russell) and Charlie, (John Batis) suggest a camping trip in the woods, which their wives Sharon, (Tomi Barrett) and Teddi, (Ann Wilkinson) want to get in on. When they get their first, they quickly begin to realize that something is wrong with the situation and try to leave. As the men arrive, they find the camping area completely abandoned and the women nowhere around. Stumbling upon loner John, (Gary Kent) who reveals that he has been living in the area for years after witnessing his wife cheating on him, it quickly dawns on them that he has been terrorizing the area and is responsible for their disappearance. Along with his two ghost children, he chases after them while they attempt to get out of the woods with the survivors of his attacks.The Good News: This one does have a few pretty good moments in it to keep it afloat. One of the best is it's complete eschewing of slasher conventions to make something similar without really distancing itself from it's target. The victims, not the typical horny teenagers, are not relentlessly stalked by a remorseless killer whose reason for killing is a total mystery. Here, we have a murderer whose reasons are clearly laid out and understandable, even if it doesn't make sense to anyone else. Additionally, he only kills out of necessity, not because he's deriving some type of pleasure. Those are two really surprising features that are quite unexpected. There's even no spring-loaded cats or other false scares. In fact, there really are no sudden jump scares in the entire film. There are some fun segments to be had from the chasing, which do get somewhat fun. The chase by the river that soon includes a dip through the icy water. The later chase at the end isn't half bad, and it opens with a really nice one through the woods that includes a few really nice moments and ends with a big bang. The last big positive is that this one has an incredible story to it. This one has a very logical reason for staying in such a dangerous situation while most would've left the area long before being put into danger. First, the two women arrive in the woods long before the others on their own camping trip and manage to become lost as the men arrive, delayed with car problems. Finally making it to the campsite, they discover their wives are missing and thus must stick around to investigate. This splitting up allows them all to be menaced by the killer but still provide a reason why they don't all immediately take off back to civilization. The lack of a single teenager in here, especially from the time period, is also nice. That helps this one be more believable and terrifying. One would expect a group of inexperienced teens to get themselves in trouble by lacking the experience or wisdom to make the best decisions under the circumstances, whereas adults would be expected to extricate themselves from bad situations with little or no help. Seeing them at the mercy of the land, as well as the killer, reminds viewers that they might find themselves in just such a situation. These more believable reasons for the characters to willingly remain in a dangerous area is a welcome change of pace, and are part of the reason why this one is at worse watchable.The Bad News: This one here does have a couple of really big flaws that are kinda hard to get over. The fact that this one really doesn't offer up much in the way of blood or gore is a big factor, especially once the cannibal overtones get thrown around. Seeing a victim strung up ready to be consumed doesn't do that, and some off-color blood splotches is little better. The gore here isn't convincing, when it gets around to showing it as nearly all of the kills are done more through implication rather than actively doing anything that might suggest a violent, brutal end. That very few are done on-screen is a big one, especially when it gets around to showing them. The very low body-count here is what really hurts that factor, since there isn't much of an opportunity to really let loose, even though the ones that are shown could've been much more brutal or even shown on-screen at the very least. There's also a problem with the back-story. A member mentions early on that the camping area to which they are going is so secluded that very few people even know about it, that they can expect to be all alone out there. If the area is that far off the beaten track and that few people frequent the area, how is the killer even staying alive? There shouldn't be enough passers-by to require sole sustenance on human flesh, yet there's enough kills each year to do so, requiring that others should know about it and meaning that there should've been more to keep visitors safe, since it's mentioned in passing about the disappearances yet nothing else is done. There's a couple of other weird little flaws in here, but none will matter as much as those.The Final Verdict: While not a complete waste, this one doesn't offer up much and really only has a couple of good points for it. This is really only for those who enjoy the backwoods slasher genre, while those who expect more high-brow horror or figure that the flaws are too much won't have a fun time with this one.Rated R: Violence and Language