MXP: Most Xtreme Primate (2004)

Tied for the best movie I have ever seen

it is the rare 'crazy' movie that actually has something to say.

Very good movie overall, highly recommended. Most of the negative reviews don't have any merit and are all pollitically based. Give this movie a chance at least, and it might give you a different perspective.

It's simply great fun, a winsome film and an occasionally over-the-top luxury fantasy that never flags.

In Britain, there is a drink called PG Tips. It's a kind of tea. It's quite nice. I personally enjoy it with a splash of milk and two generous spoonfuls of sugar. During the 90's it was the biggest selling tea in Britain, even outselling the tea conglomerate Typhoo. The reason for this was a clever marketing campaign featuring even cleverer monkeys who read the newspaper and erm, drink tea and stuff. During the 70's, the chimps were taken off the air only to be brought back 18 months later with PG tips facing rapidly declining sales. See? Chimps can do good stuff. In the name of moderniazation and er, animal rights (what's that?), the chimps have again been taken off the air and replaced with claymation bird models. However, clever Hollywood types sat up and took notice. People like monkeys. They look like people! But funnier! Ha Ha! Funny-like-people-monkeys!!!!!! Forcibly and hungrily breast-feeding itself on the PG tips monkey's success comes MXP, where chimps do all the things they were born to do: snowboarding, shaving, cooking and faithfully re-enacting the plots of all the Home Alone movies. This is not a film not to watch because you don't like monkeys. This is not a film not to watch because you are a card carrying member of PETA. This is a film not to watch because you will gnaw your own arm off and wish you were dead. No animals were harmed during the filming. Let us hope the same can not be said of the actors, producer, director and all involved in this sad, sad movie made for (and by) people who like gnawing their arm off and wishing they were dead.

At the outset, I must warn everyone that I am an avid snowboarder and I have worked with many primates. One thing I can say for sure is that this plot is simply unbelievable.I have seen the previous two installments of MVP, but this one by far is off the deep end. First, a chimp playing hockey. Yeah, I can see that. Then, a chimp skateboarding. A little less believable, but possible. But a chimp snowboarding? I think we're bordering on ridiculous now.I've worked with chimps, and certainly, they're intelligent enough to communicate in sign language, and convey their feelings. But snowboarding? What's next in MVP IV, a chimp that can cure cancer? I mean, come on. Let's not forget, that this animal will OFTEN throw its feces at anyone within 50 feet. Sure, I understand that they're trainable, and come off well on the big screen. But snowboarding? Why not have a lawyer show with MVP giving birth to a donkey? At least science makes that a possibility. This just isn't worth it, folks. Unless you'd like to build a stable in your backyard for your unicorns or ride a giraffe to work backwards, then don't watch this movie. It's pure fantasy. I mean, a chimp that snowboards? C'mon.

If Disney's name was still somewhere on this one, I bet they wish they'd have taken it off by now. After affixing the Disney brand to five--count 'em, five--Air Bud installations, all laughable after the first one broke some modest ground (and prompted rumors from PETA that Buddy the dog was killed by bone spurs resulting from wearing tennis shoes in filming), any affiliation with this travesty must be purely contractual. This film does nothing, is nothing, and means nothing; it has all the Disney stereotypes: the unsure new kid in town, his surfer-talking, typical-teen older brother punk rock guitarist (played hilariously by Trevor Wright), the hot snowboard instructor girl (who inevitably falls for Wright's character, despite lack of screen time together), the single father, bumbling criminals under a kingpin boss who should just fire the two, and the apparently psychotic monkey lady who follows her chimps across two countries on airlines that apparently allow monkeys to use passports and occupy seats. This series has become the new "Land Before Time," trudging out the same tired stories, straight-to-DVD, and waiting for overeager parents to grab it off the Wal-Mart shelf, slap this tripe on and shut their kids up. Will it work? Unfortunately, yes. Is it shameful, the continued lack of creativity in producing childrens' films? Absolutely. "MXP: Most Xtreme Primate" is sickening to watch and is simply a bunch of flashy editing and colors to brainwash Junior for 88 minutes. Parents couldn't be happier, but anyone who actually takes a look at this will think, "Wait, didn't that dog do this in 1997?" Fortunately, no recognizable actors or actresses surface in this one to showcase just how hard they've fallen (as was not the case in something like "American Psycho 2," the deplorable sequel to a classic featuring Mila Kunis and ol' Bill Shatner). Get something like "Land Before Time ONE" or "Heavyweights" for the kids tonight--they stand up much better than this mistake ever will.

This movie is fantastic. From the opening, where four intrepid chimps wearing straw Mexican hats and serapes fly to Colorado on a commercial airliner to the breathtaking nordic stunts, this movie is a winner all the way! This series of movies rules! Highly recommended. I can't wait for the next installment.