The Nun (2006)

Just what I expected

Did you people see the same film I saw?

Fanciful, disturbing, and wildly original, it announces the arrival of a fresh, bold voice in American cinema.

It’s fine. It's literally the definition of a fine movie. You’ve seen it before, you know every beat and outcome before the characters even do. Only question is how much escapism you’re looking for.

I am a huge horror fan, particularly Spanish horror. This film had so many possibilities to be good. It's a marvelous idea, a vigilante ghost nun, as most of what has come out of Jaume Balangueró's mind. Both visual and sound effects were also pretty good. But everything was shamefully spoiled by bad direction, awful casting and a painfully bad (exposition, exposition!) script. Too bad. Maybe Balangueró should write and direct himself a remake...Moreover, I don't really understand why this had to be spoken in English by actors who can't really speak English (and when they do, they do it so bad it just makes their performances even more fake). If you look at contemporary Spanish horror films like El Orfanato or Rec, the performances are totally in tune with this type of stylish ghost story - and that is being realistic, being believable as someone like ourselves, like real people, because that is the only way horror achieves it's goal. Unfortunately, everything failed in La Monja.

Personally, I think too many people are critical of the Movie, it was actually done pretty well.I was surprised that a Spanish Movie was done entirely in English though.Not that it bothers me because I was born in America.The Movie was about how the Evil Spirit of a Nun had risen from her watery grave after the Spanish Government had drained a pond filled with Holy Water near a closed down Convent.The Nun, Sister Ursula had been killed 18 Years before by her Students after she was caught torturing one of them in the Bathroom after discovering that she was pregnant (And by a Priest no doubt).They ended up killing her because they knew she was too violent to let them all go after they first attacked her.They then through Ursula's corpse into the Pond.Because the Pond had been made up of Holy Water the Vengeful Nun's Spirit was trapped inside the Pond and was rendered immobile for years until it was drained.She then began rising from Water in the Homes of all her Victims and killing them in the same way that the Saints they were named after were killed.The Daughter of the Pregnant girl who is now named Eve, ended up walking in on the Murder of her Mother when she saw the Nun slit her Throat with the knife she had picked up to defend herself originally.She ends up meeting the Woman Christy who was then killed that same Night by the Nun and Christy walked in the Bulding to find Christie dead and had seen the Nun's Spirit float out of the Building.The woman told her she was going to meet with her Mother the next day and all of the other Classmates in Barcelona,Spain.So she then decides to go to Barcelona and warn them and try and find out what had actually happened.Later on she meets and falls in love with a young Spanish man whom is studying to be a Priest and then he gets killed along with the only 2 Survivors of all the Boarding school girls, leaving only her with her 2 friends alive.She ends up killing the Nun, because the Young Priest figured that because the Nun uses Water to cause all of the Murders the only way she can be killed is in Water.And because the Nun was named after Saint Ursula who died by an arrow through the heart,she had to be killed in a similar fashion.But the Movie ends pretty badly because while the girl does kill the Nun, she has died also, but with the same arrow through her own heart.The Character Joel, figures that Eva must have been mentally deranged and knew all along that she had been fathered by a Priest and that her Mother and friends had Murdered the Nun.So she somehow developed a Split personality taking on the Role of the Nun and thus carried out these Murders in her name.But the Movie never at any point or even at the very end showed anything that suggests that the girl was deranged at any point.Also, she demonstrated no knowledge of the events that took place years ago and had now come to pass.And what motive could she have possibly had for killing her Mother and her Mother's friends when they had only killed a Vicious Nun in self-defense? Eve had never even met the Nun or much less cared for her.So she had no reason to exact revenge on any of them for anything.After all, they had saved her life in the act of killing the Nun because Sister Ursula was trying to kill her before she could even be born.So if anything she had more reason to praise them for doing it.

I suppose we could say that this movie is not, shall we say... a 'serious' horror film?. That means that the story is beyond delirious and a bit silly to a certain extent, but that doesn't necessarily imply that it can't be enjoyed. The main premise in this nice little horror flick, is obviously not a very realistic one and leaving aside the so-called ridiculousness of the story, this is definitely a must-see to all slasher fans. It seems however that this film was not exactly acclaimed and my wild guess is that the disappointment comes from grind-house lovers who expected a good'ol nunsplotaition flick and they got a Hollywood-like Spanish slasher instead. The other possibility is that some of the angry reviewers are the ones who assumed that this film was going to be by some means similar to "Darkness", which was written (and also directed) by Jaume Balagueró, who was in charge of the story here as well. Considering that "Darkness" was far more respected when it came out for being among other things so atmospheric and artsy, I wouldn't be surprised if some people expected something mildly similar or at least a few connections with this movie. However, "La Monja" was not directed by Mr. Balagueró, so I really don't see why there should be any connection whatsoever. So my little advice to anyone who is expecting anything remotely similar to "Darkness", is to discard this slasher, because it will turn out to be a major let down.In "La Monja", six young ladies in a Catholic boarding school, are tormented by a cruel nun called Úrsula, who is also the headmistress of the establishment. One day, during a sadistic purification ritual, Sister Úrsula goes a little bit too far with her medieval methods and tries to drown Mary, one of the students, as a way to purify her sinful soul. However, her cruel ritual is interrupted by the other girls, who rise up against Sister Úrsula and kill her. After that, they decide to make a pact of silence and throw her body inside a pool of holy water. Eighteen years later, Eve, Mary's daughter, begins to have strange hallucinations about a vicious nun who appears out of nowhere. Several people start to die around her, including her own mother and some of her class mates. Right after her mother's mysterious death, Eve takes a trip to Spain with her friends, only to find out that she's merely doomed to confront a terrible fate and discover an awful truth about herself.The plot clearly promises a nice slasher... and a nice slasher we get!. With a nice variety of well done murders and moderated use of CGI, this bizarre horror gem manages to entertain and mock slasher films for their similarities and lack of originality. "La Monja" is a good exponent of what contemporary slasher films are all about and even though the film is a Spanish production, it does a good work emulating some of the finest American films out there. The supernatural villain reinforces the evidence that the director clearly wasn't aiming to a dark or profound film and instead, he basically wanted to achieve a highly entertaining and unpretentious horror gem to enjoy with some pop-corn and a large soda. If you're in the mood for some genuine and simple fun, give this evil nun and chance and she won't disappoint you with her cruel punishments against the sinners who dare to stand in her way.

this movie has joined a plethora of amazingly horrible horror flicks on my shelf.it's so bad that it's good. that being said, when i'm rich and famous my friend and i are so remaking this movie...and i'm so going to be the nun for halloween next year.yeah, this movie is going up there with bones, crazy lips, uzumaki and any other awesomely bad Chinese/Japanese/korean/thai horror flicks i've seen, cheerleading camp, and every other horrible horror movie out there.yay horror films, yay nuns!