The Machine Girl (2008)

I think this is a new genre that they're all sort of working their way through it and haven't got all the kinks worked out yet but it's a genre that works for me.

People are voting emotionally.

Far from Perfect, Far from Terrible

This movie was so-so. It had it's moments, but wasn't the greatest.

This does, as they say, what it says on the can. Blood spurts, or should I say, fountains, everywhere throughout this outrageous movie and the young girls manage to look ravishing all the time, despite the horrendous goings on. And pretty grim much of it is with severed limbs and other gut wrenching violence. All this, however, is done in such an, over the top manner, that only once or twice do we wince and indeed after a while there is a sense of monotony creeping into the proceedings. Only an hour and a half long this could nevertheless have done with a little tightening. Or maybe I'm being unfair, remembering that inscription on the can, we get plenty of flashes of white panties and bare thighs as our heroine flies hither and thither delivering death and destruction and the aforementioned blood does keep on flowing. I liked the connections drawn between the shrines and the yakuza gangs but felt I could have been a little more drawn into the goings on.

Life in Japan is tough for school-kids. Constantly terrorised by katana-happy sons of ninja-yakuza can have one hell of an influence on the psyche. Fortunately given Japanese youth have seemingly unparalleled survival instincts most of the kids have serious kung-pow powers. Especially adequately Asian-porn attired schoolgirls. After bullies incite the death of Yu Hyuga (Ryôsuke Kawamura) his big sis Ami (Minase Yashiro) decides to go out with a vengeance killing whoever comes in her path. Even losing an arm does not weaken her resolve to kick bottoms, so with the help of allies she mounts a machine gun on her stub and initiates a sequence of events, which will require about 1000 litres of tomato juice from the SFX crew.In this absurd crash course into Japanese ultragore nothing really seems to hit home. The plot and acting is laughable, but given the whole movie is basically an overlong joke, that isn't much of an issue. Watching such a ridiculously bloody film with arm-chainsaws, leg-chainsaws, finger sushi and drill bras you don't expect to be in awe with the script. You basically expect no-holds-barred fun.Nonetheless the movie fails in its ridiculousness, as it quickly becomes tedious and tiresome. And I am not one to criticise a movie for corny gore, as I fond of movies such as "Ichi the Killer" and "Tokyo Gore Police" immensely entertaining. Nonetheless in "The Machine Girl" the mix never works, which in a large part is owing to overlong build-up with lack of plotting to keep you interested. The movie may be audacious, but that it itself is not enough to keep the eye focused.

Insanity from Japan. "The Machine Girl" is a modern blood-soak tale of revenge. A simple, candid payback story (which is a running theme with many characters getting onto the act as blood ties are important), however there's nothing restrained about its macabre humour and over-the-top visuals. Campy make-up and cheesy gore effects on CGI overload, but there's a gleeful sense to all of the spurting mayhem that it's hard to take seriously or to be disturbed by. Comic-book pulp with a typical grindhouse edge, sees many characters (some quite colourful or cornball) come and go and plenty of outlandish instances formulate into deliriously unholy madness --- but these gratuitously choreographed sequences were delivered with plenty of ticker and style by writer / director Noboru Iguchi. Crisp cinematography and a sprightly cued score added to the exuberance, although I did find the mid-section to somewhat drag a bit.High-school girl Ami sets out to avenge her younger brother's death at the hands of some school bullies who have ties in the Yakuza family. But her first encounter sees her losing half of her left arm and barely escaping to find shelter in a garage that's owned by her brother's dead friend's parents. There they heal her, arm her up with a high-powered machine gun and she teams up with the chainsaw-wielding mother Miki for revenge of their loved ones. A cute Minase Yashiro brings a strong and determined presence to her Ami character and Asami along side her has a forceful stability as Miki. The bad guy roles are colourfully done with venom by Kentarô Shimazu, Honokaa (wearing a bra that you won't forget) and Nobuhiro Nishihara. Overcooked, but ludicrously ruthless bloodbath fun.

Machine Girl (Kataude mashin gâru): 7 out of 10: People in Japan must have very high blood pressure. They don’t bleed in Machine Girl, as much as they outright gush gallons of the red stuff. The effect is so over the top it adds a sense of outrageous humor to what could have been a fairly grim affair. After all the story concerns a college girl who gets a prosthetic weapon attached to her elbow after a member of the Yakuza amputates her lower arm to disused her from investigating the suiciding of her younger brother.This quick synopsis actually understates the depravity our heroine undergoes before she gets all Death Wish on anyone with a shiny business suit.Our Rick Allenesqe heroine is played by the delightful and delicious Japanese model/actress Minase Yashiro. In fact one of the movies strong points is a quite attractive cast wearing schoolgirl outfits and cameo like some cosplayers wet dream. Mono-named Asami and Honoka join Yashiro to round out the attractive female cast.Machine Girl however never really hooks the viewer emotionally. It is all so over the top and cartoonish. Exploitation films often benefit from allowing the audience to get emotionally involved with the characters (Think Mad Max or Savage Streets). I don’t blame the actresses in this case; I simply think the script could have taken a breather from the silliness to add some much needed poignancy.The entire film plays like an overlong Monty Python skit. It has great set pieces, decent special effects and enough fetish material to keep a Chaku-ero fan in his basement for a week. It simply doesn’t tell a compelling story, nor does it allow one to become attached to any of the characters involved.That said however, I simply cannot dislike a film that features a bra made out of industrial drills. So turn you mind off, send the misses out shopping and enjoy.