Kull the Conqueror (1997)

Boring, long, and too preachy.

It isn't all that great, actually. Really cheesy and very predicable of how certain scenes are gonna turn play out. However, I guess that's the charm of it all, because I would consider this one of my guilty pleasures.

The biggest problem with this movie is it’s a little better than you think it might be, which somehow makes it worse. As in, it takes itself a bit too seriously, which makes most of the movie feel kind of dull.

The movie is made so realistic it has a lot of that WoW feeling at the right moments and never tooo over the top. the suspense is done so well and the emotion is felt. Very well put together with the music and all.

Is the film any good? No. Is the film at least fun? Yes. I agree the film does not take itself seriously. It's one of those lazy afternoon films when there's not a lot on and you simply want to rest watching a silly film - but you'd have to like sword and sorcery films to even begin to enjoy this movie.Acting is mediocre at best. Costumes, sets and creatures are cool enough. Lame story but somehow fun enough to keep me a bit interested. I can easily watch this film and let my mind wonder off without missing much of anything.Some funny scenes - I like the farting camel. LOL.The Conan films are better but this one but this one is alright enough for something different in the barbarian category.5.5/10

Back in the 1990s, there was a syndicated TV show called "Hercules: The Legendary Journeys". It starred Kevin Sorbo as the demi-god and followed the light hearted adventures of the son of Zeus as he and various companions wandered through the world of ancient myth, punching evil in the face. The shows blend of action, humor and moral earnestness was so popular it spawned a companion series called "Xena: Warrior Princess". Unfortunately, it also shaped this sub-mediocre entry into the sword-n-sorcery genre.Kull is another creation of Robert E. Howard, the mind behind Conan the Barbarian. Kull is also a barbarian, but one who lands on the throne of the kingdom of Valusia. In Howard's short stories, Kull must defend his land from external enemies and his crown from treasonous nobles. This movie has only the barest of those details in common with Howard's writing, and I'm not sure why they bothered. Kull the Conqueror has very little to do with the spirit or substance of Robert E. Howard. It's basically a more generic and inferior version of Conan the Destroyer, which was itself a huge step down from the original Conan the Barbarian.The first half of the film deals with Kull's (Kevin Sorbo) ascension to the throne and the plotting nobles led by General Taligaro (Thomas Ian Griffith). Kull meets a beautiful fortune teller (Katrina Lombard) and the nobles enlist the help of a wizard (Edward Tudor-Pole) to resurrect an ancient demon queen (Tia Carrera). His enemies seemingly kill Kull, but then he turns up fine and teams up with the fortune teller and her priestly brother (Litefoot) as the story becomes the exact same sort of quest we've seen a jillion times before in these films.The first thing to know about Kull the Conqueror is that is has a cringingly bad hair metal soundtrack. The overblown guitar riffs here make the soundtrack of Ladyhawke seem like the greatest music ever made. The second thing to know about this movie is that all the action and comedy are virtually identical in tone to "Hercules: The Legendary Journeys", except dumber and without much of a moral center. That vacuousness joins hands with a grating sense of modernity in everything the characters do and say to create a doubly anachronistic feeling. This thing comes off like a lame 80s action movie playing dress up. The third thing to know is that Sorbo gives the best performance by far with an indifferent version of the same exact stuff he did as Hercules.All I can say about Kull the Conqueror is that it won't make your eyes bleed. There's nothing here that could even be charitably described as "good", but you won't feel like you completely wasted your time if you watch it.

First the good news. This picture has production design worthy of Conan creator Robert E. Howard's legacy. Everything else is bad news. The script is allegedly a many version hand-me-down re-working of the never made third Conan movie, the film in which Conan would finally win the throne of Aquilonia. Instead we get Howard's backup hero (Kull) who takes the throne at the beginning of the film in an un-stirring, non-epic little battle and then loses it quickly to Witch Demon Akivasha (played to the hilt by Tia Carrere who obviously had rare fun as a bad girl). Kull then kills an hour on a very routine quest-to-find-his-right-to-rule and finally returns for the classic Howard showdown between good brawn and evil sorcery. The main problem is Kevin Sorbo, who got so good at playing Hercules in self-spoofing post-modern fashion that he simply doesn't resonate with the necessary authentic bronze age thuggishness of a Howard hero. Here was a chance to play a variation on his usual screen self and he punted it. Too bad. The set decorators captured the proper essence of Robert Howard...

In the very beginning of the movie, Kull (Hercules) is attempting to join an army, but fails. This is odd, because he seems to be a foreigner since he seems to know nothing of the local culture. Therefore, why would he try to join an army of a country he's never heard of? The King has gone mad and is killing all his sons, and Kull stops him by killing him. The army I already mentioned were all made up of men of royal blood (I.e. the King's relatives) so, since all the Kings direct heirs are dead, there is some confusion as to which one of the soldiers is the rightful heir. It's most likely one of two of the soldiers, and of course they themselves are somewhat bias as to which one it is. However, the King, with his dying breath, decrees that Kull is the next King.And that's the first three minutes of the movie. (Or might have even been the first MINUTE).This is basically a low-budget sword-and-sorcery movie. The culture isn't established enough, Nothing's really explained about Kull's motives other than liking axes and not liking slavery, and basically the whole movie is alright but not great. See this movie if you just wanna see some low-budget sword-and-sorcery, or if you like to watch movies for the purpose of laughing at them. If you like GOOD movies, I suggest Lord of the Rings.