The Graves (2010)

Absolutely Fantastic

It is not only a funny movie, but it allows a great amount of joy for anyone who watches it.

The acting in this movie is really good.

Mostly, the movie is committed to the value of a good time.

This actually appeared on SyFy Channel. I am going to assume they only muted out the few words that I didn't hear and that was pretty much it. So I won't blame the channel for a poor edit. Pretty lame movie at the start quickly introducing us to two hot sisters who are supposed to be into comic books. Then we see them in the punk goth club for one last night out before they take a road trip heading towards more boredom than anything else.The plot "borrows" from many older movies where young adults breakdown, visit, and otherwise go where angels fear to tread. This is as old as the traveling salesman jokes. Tony Todd makes a few appearances in this movie, but he is not portraying anything scary as he has in his other movies. His character is more like a clown than a monster. I can only imagine his need for money and hope that no one actually watched this movie was his reason for taking the role.You can't feel anything for the characters since they never really develop during the movie. There is no sense of suspense, no horror, no chills, or thrills. In fact, one scene between actress Clare Grant and Bill Moseley in a school house has no impact on the movie as it really should. I wasn't quaking in fear that anyone was in danger. It felt more like a practical joke, as if Jillian Murray should have walked in and said, "Are you scared? Well you shouldn't be, because you're on Scare Tactics!".

I had to register just so I could review this.I agree with the reviewer that said they wanted back the hour and a half of their life that they wasted watching this. I was, however, disappointed to find that I could not give it 0 stars. Awful is not really adequate to describe this movie. The only good thing I can say about it is, at least the female characters were not totally helpless. Aside from that. . . the Arizona scenery was nice? The acting was poor. The stupid storyline was definitely lacking. It was convoluted and contrived. There was really no suspense or tension, kind of necessary in a horror movie.Mostly though, the theme of "crazy, evil religious people" killing people is kind of offensive and a really tired and ineffective plot device.

Wow……and to think that all of the movies in the After Dark Horror-fest would be somewhat, oh I don't know…enjoyable? Because of what I had to deal with this first film, The Graves,……well, it wasn't pretty.The Graves, a miserable little turd fest of a film, is about two girls, Meghan and Abby, going on a last trip together before Meghan leaves for New York. They go to comic book stores (which, I'm sorry, these girls look like they've never set foot in a comic shop in their lives) and talk about how Lady Death is the most awesome comic book ever…….really? (And don't worry, this is only one of the many faults of this movie.) They then stop in a diner (which is so far out of the way that the first girl to die in the original Nightmare on Elm Street is stuck waiting there), and they're lead to Skull Mine, which is said to be a ghost town after some brutal murders took place there. And then, guess what? Everything goes to hell……what a shock….My first point is Brian Pulido. I should just stop there, but I'll guess I'll keep going. If you don't know who he is, he is one of the WORST comic book writers from the 1990s and the 2000s. He's responsible for writing such terrible comic books such as Lady Death (which I referred to before) and Evil Ernie. So when I heard he wrote, directed, and produced this piece of utter crap, I already knew it was going to be terrible. He doesn't have a clue what he's doing and he should stop thinking he can do anything creative.And some of the acting in here is atrocious. You have your two female protagonists who can't act their way out of a wet paper bag. I mean, they have scenes where they are just SO melodramatic in scenes where they're in total danger! Also, you have Tony Todd……..really? Tony, why did you chose this? Did your wife need a new car? Did your daughter need more money to get into the collage she wanted? I mean, you were the candy man! Your cartoon-styled acting in this is so bad, that I almost broke down and cried.Now, if there is anything redeemable about this film, it's that Bill Mosely (yep, Devils Rejects Bill Mosely) plays a guy called the "Pig Man", who is just a guy who puts on a fake pig nose and likes to kill people. I have to say that whenever he was on screen, a shimmer of light helped me get through this film.But, all in all, there is almost (almost!) nothing to like about this film. It's not scary, it's not funny, it's not dramatic, It's not anything! And if it weren't for Bill Mosely, I would give this film a flat out zero.

I got this one from Redbox the other nite cuz i'd seen pretty much everything else from there that I had any real interest in. I really should have saved my dollar. Two sisters take a road-trip to Arizona to see the world's biggest thermometer (?) because one of the sisters is moving to NY. They end up in some hick village and are stalked by the locals. Then what started as a sub-par 'deranged rednecks' film abruptly turned into a sub-par supernatural-horror film. I really have nothing else to say about the content of this mess...Everything sucks about THE GRAVES. The storyline is stupid, the acting (while not the worst I've ever seen...) is pretty bad, and the FX (both the gore and 'supernatural' scenes) are atrocious. Bill Moseley does an OK job with the crap he's given, and Tony Todd is unmemorable in his role. Honestly, I can't think of anything I've ever seen Todd in since the original Candyman where his role stood out. A complete lack of nudity from the attractive female leads rounds out my overall disappointment with this dull, un-scary, poorly made garbage. The only thing I slightly enjoyed was the 10-seconds or so in the beginning that featured an over-dubbed 'live' performance from the band CALABRESE. I like them a lot so I'll give the film a pretty generous 2 points for their involvement, and for the passable performance by Moseley. If it weren't for the heavy narcotics that rendered me unable to take the disc out, I would've turned this off after the first 15 minutes...2/10