Brain Smasher... A Love Story (1993)
A professional model, Sam Crain, is asked by her sister to smuggle a package from Europe to Portland Oregon, where she discovers that her sister is battling Chinese Shaolin Monks (not ninjas!). Fleeing the monks, Sam unwittingly involves Ed "Brainsmasher" Molloy, a nightclub bouncer.
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Truly Dreadful Film
Tied for the best movie I have ever seen
Self-important, over-dramatic, uninspired.
Absolutely brilliant
"Brain Smasher...A Love Story" is sort of fun to watch (there must be about 5 or 6 laughs here and there) and Teri Hatcher is sexy and feisty. But the script is just too thin and one-note: these evil Chinese monks want this flower that is the key to Ultimate Power, and Andrew Dice Clay, Teri Hatcher and Deborah Van Valkenburgh try to keep it away from them. That's it. The whole movie is basically an extended chase, without many plot complications: the monks catch up to the heroes, the heroes fight them off, the heroes run away, repeat. The other thing that bugged me was the inconsistency in the way these monks are presented: at certain times they seem to be invincible and almost superhuman, jumping from and to incredible heights (these acrobatics are definitely the freshest idea of the movie), at other times they are bumbling, inept and useless in a fight. Oh well, I guess you can just look admiringly at Teri Hatcher and try to forgive the weaknesses....Footnote: Brion James and Tim Thomerson have two very small parts as police officers. (**)
A straight to video surprise, Brain Smasher is everything a good low budget b-movie should be. Andrew Dice Clay and Teri Hatcher star in this weird, yet funny and enjoyable action packed love story that makes you shake your head and smile. Not your typical love story, Brain Smasher is a simple story of boy meets girl, boy saves girl, and boy wins girl in the end. Andrew Dice Clay plays, more or less, himself in this movie. Although he is not the typical Dice that we have seen on stage, he gives a good performance to prove once again to the critics that he is an actor and not just a comedian. Hatcher adds her sexy charm and wit to the movie as the story's damsel. Together, they are an interesting match. For fans of both actors, Brain Smasher is one of those movies you rent when all else fails.
This is the campiest movie you will ever see. It is so bad that it is hysterical. Teri Hatcher tries to play it straight and Andrew Dice Clay is just Andrew Dice Clay. See it. The laughs will make you glad you did.
This film is excellent, a must-see for fans of action/comedies. Dice-Clay and Hatcher are both terrific in the lead roles, while the woman who played Seinfeld's mother in the tv series is also very good. The film also has quite good special effects and is a lot of fun!