The Embalmer (1965)

You won't be disappointed!

If the ambition is to provide two hours of instantly forgettable, popcorn-munching escapism, it succeeds.

Not sure how, but this is easily one of the best movies all summer. Multiple levels of funny, never takes itself seriously, super colorful, and creative.

A terrific literary drama and character piece that shows how the process of creating art can be seen differently by those doing it and those looking at it from the outside.

Following a series of abductions, a local police officer in Venice investigating the disappearances is continually stumped about the nature of the crimes, and as the abductions continue a break in the case allows him to solve the identity of the strange killer and races to stop him.This one wasn't all that awful a giallo effort. One of the finer points of this one is the fact that there's quite a strong number of abduction sequences place throughout here. Starting off rather quickly with the opening showing off several quick abductions, this comes off really nicely with the multiple women getting targeted and kidnapped while out in the city or near the water to get the mystery going in a big start, and once the action shifts to the maniac's headquarters below the city the underground catacombs have the appropriately dark and wet atmosphere throughout here. Since there's a nice bit of work done to enhance the atmosphere of the location with the dead women who are stuck inside the glass cases forever embalmed through the gruesome ideas contained within here. The later investigation scenes in the basement of the hotel or the backstage scenes of the club manage to feature some solid suspense moments, with the abduction off the boat amongst the crowded tourists is quite an impressive sequence. The other big point here is the big action in the finale where the tense and utterly chilling stalking in the underground sewers, as well as the confrontations in the crypt where it takes on some great work with the killers' disguise and the chases throughout the tunnels, give this a fun, action- packed finale. These here give this one enough to like to hold it up over it's few minor flaws. The biggest issue with the film is the absolutely dreadful pacing here, which really ruins the film more than anything. Although the inclusion of the girls' tourist trip to the city adds bodies to the killers' list, the fact that this stops the film cold to show off the usual tourist locales of Venice are far too obviously designed to pad out the running time, brief as it is. There's no real need for this one to go to that kind of duration dealing with the type of fodder as this one does, and once it moves forward with them running around to all the tourist locations and events the film has run through too much time to get back to the action in the remaining part of the film. That really does limit the action to a few scenes here alongside the other big flaw as the film's reliance on abductions over killing does hurt as well so this one does feel tamer than what came before. Although it does look cheap and somewhat low-budget in the worst ways, these here really do bring this one down.Today's Rating/PG: Violence.

Low budget thriller concerns the disappearance of young women in Venice, prompting a dapper investigative reporter (and ladies' man) to suspect that it's the work of an aquatic monster who lunges from the city's canals snatching his victims and taking them to a watery grave. The audience however knows this isn't the case, the culprit a mysterious madman whose underwater access to a secret mausoleum conceals a morbid treasure trove of beautiful mummies to indulge his sick, private fantasies.Predictable, though not unwatchable, it's a beatnik-inspired Venetian affair with lots of acoustic guitar and jazzy ensembles, underground clubs, pointless dancing and a window into the care-free 60's pop-culture scene that inhabited Italy at the time. The dubbing is typically facile and so it's difficult to gauge whether the acting is any good, though it doesn't necessarily diminish the movie, assuming you don't have high expectations of this bloodless, though still somewhat ghoulish Italian horror movie.

The idea behind this film is pretty original and very frightening. There's a psycho in Venice who kidnaps beautiful women and then embalms them to put in his private collection! However, despite this really cool plot, the overall film really wasn't very good--especially in the final 20 minutes. That's because in order to make the film work, the writers have the characters make so many brainless mistakes that the film comes off poorly. Here are some of the major plot problems: 1. A lady discovers that the hotel manager is, at the very least, a sex pervert. Instead of telling the police, she goes to the manager's apartment. When he isn't there, she lets herself in and looks around. When she "accidentally" discovers a secret panel to an underground lair, she investigates it on her own--never going for help!! 2. When there is a big fight between our hero and the murderer on the early streets of Venice, not once does the hero call out for help--even though he has many opportunities. When the murderer starts to win in their fight, the guy STILL doesn't call for help nor did he arrange for any backup. Apparently, like the stupid lady in #1, he is too cool to get help.This is an Italian-made horror film that was dubbed into English. Oddly, while the lips, of course, aren't in sync when everyone is speaking in English because of the dubbing, even the part where a guy sings in Italian is way out of sync--which is just odd.Despite these brainless problems with the film, the coolness of the plot makes up for a lot of this. While it certainly ain't "art", it is a reasonably decent time-passer.

A deranged frogman is kidnapping the most beautiful women of Venice and taking them to the sunken cathedral that serves as his lair. Once there, he dons a hooded robe and skull mask and embalms the young women in an attempt to preserve their beauty. The police are so ineffective that it's up to a local reporter to crack the case. And when his sweetheart goes missing, he steps up his efforts to discover the whereabouts of the missing women and the crazed killer.What Works: The Chase Scene. The final chase scene through the cathedral does provide a few suspenseful moments. It also provides the only real memorable image from the movie. The scene where the hooded, masked killer hides himself among the decaying corpses of the monks is easily the highlight of The Monster of Venice.What Doesn't Work: The Acting. In a word, it's abysmal. I don't think it's just a case of bad dubbing – these people couldn't be convincing if their life depended on it.The Travelogue. While Venice is undeniably a beautiful city, much of the movie appears to have been directed by the local tourism bureau. We are treated to scene after scene of the lovely buildings and waterways of Venice. While they are certainly some nice looking moments, they have nothing to do with the movie and bring an already dull script to a screeching halt.The Killer's Monologue. The hooded killer loves to go on and on about preserving the beauty of his captives. It quickly becomes pointless and repetitive. And why does he feel the need to deliver these soliloquies? There's no one around to hear his words. He has embalmed his only audience.The Beautiful Women. This may sound shallow, but if these are the most beautiful women Venice has to offer, I would hate to see the rest of the populace. I would have trouble going so far as to say that any of the women approach being mildly attractive, let alone beautiful.I give up. I could probably continue to list more individual weaknesses, but what's the point. Everything you could name – plot, characters, action, atmosphere, dialogue, etc. – are bottom of the barrel. Other than the finale, this is one incredibly dull film. If you really feel the need to watch The Monster of Venice, do yourself a favor and fast-forward the movie to the final 10 minutes. You'll thank me for this piece of advice.