Future War (1997)

Absolutely Fantastic

After playing with our expectations, this turns out to be a very different sort of film.

It's the kind of movie you'll want to see a second time with someone who hasn't seen it yet, to remember what it was like to watch it for the first time.

The movie's neither hopeful in contrived ways, nor hopeless in different contrived ways. Somehow it manages to be wonderful

Have you noticed that every bad movie begins with an absurdly long credit scene? Future war is no different. I understand sometimes there are budget constraints but if you only have limited funds, much better to choose a script that does not require CGI.Acting is poor, but not as poor as some other bad movies 2.5/10. The character who plays Fred was probably the pick of the bunch. Script wasn't exactly genius, random objects can always be found when needed. Setting is very basic, it seems the director knew someone who owned a warehouse at least. Possibly even a cardboard box factory. Main 'cyborg' Antagonist looks like he just stepped out of a Kiss concert. Graphics are poor, badly done even to 1970s standards. The sock puppets are quite well done.... I mean they do look like kids toys but you couldn't see the hand right?Cinematography and direction practical non-existant. Production had no clue. Camera is unstable, probably hand held all the way through. Sound is choppy at times, sometimes it is passable. If it wasn't for the dinosaurs, if it were a bounty hunter using robot darlek-like trackers or something, and with a slightly higher production budget, mainly for some actual production and a script review. This could have been a 3 or 4.This is bad, but not as bad as some. Some decent laughs especially in the Dino scenes

I believe I may be one of only two people on the planet that watched this mess without knowing it was on Mystery Science Theater. My buddy who bought it for five bucks back in 2003 at an Airforce Post Exchange on Okinawa, being the other one. We watched this terrible movie quite a few times over that six month deployment, because we honestly thought that we had stumbled on the worst movie of all time. We wanted to get revenge on the cruel world that allowed such a piece of unholy trash to be made, by showing it to anyone who was stupid enough to watch. Thinking back, this was flawed logic...because all it did was force us to view it with them...again. Pretty sure my IQ is significantly lower in 2008 than it was in 2003, pre-future war. Anyway, no need for me to rehash the kick @ss plot or report on the stellar acting, or applaud the wonderful special effects. That has been done enough already. I did this review because I wanted to comment on the "producer speaks" comment. I believe he said that he didn't understand how anyone could say this was a terrible movie. WHAT?!! My response is I don't understand how you are a movie producer if you help movies like this see the light of day AND then have the nerve to ask that question? Then he goes on to state how people who didn't work on this particular movie or ANY movie "for that matter" are not qualified to comment on a movie being bad. Wow...are you kidding? That would be like me getting my food back at my table burned, two hours after placing my order and not being allowed to critique it because I'm not A CHEF. Movies are made for THE VIEWERS!!!! So of course THE VIEWERS have every right to criticize movies, especially ones that rob of us of our time, money and dignity.

Daniel Bernhardt (The guy who starred in Bloodsport II) stars as a slave from a different planet who escapes cyborgs and dinosaurs in a future where Earth is heaven to the alien humans who ditch the slave planet run by cyborgs. It's quite possible that this was intended to be a deep absorbing drama about the trouble with immigration and the lengths illegal aliens go to live their dream and escape the problems of poverty. Of course the symbolism is all there, the cyborgs represent poverty, Daniel Bernhardt represents the hard work and determination to get ahead and the dinosaurs represent the border patrol (How else do you explain how these dinosaurs fail to ever stop Daniel Bernhardt) of course he protects the American girl and her friends because nobody else will do it. Once again the symbolism stacks up mightily. This is truly a fascinating work of art that really details the struggle of an immigrant and his dream to elude the capture of poverty. The fight sequences represent hard work and due to the (not so) fancy footwork Bernhardt is able to get ahead and accomplish his dream. Truly an inspiration to people everywhere that if one comes more will follow. This could very well be the most heartfelt and subtle political commentary on immigration in this country. Then again considering the porn level production values, terrible acting and lame fight sequences, probably not. Still this is a not too bad movie, if you discount everything that makes a movie good.1/2* out of 4-(Awful)

This is certainly one of them.This concoction's story is based on man's future as slaves to an alien race or something. Earth is an escape, known as heaven, according to the movie. The story takes place on Earth, and has kick boxing, cyborgs, gangs from the "hood", a bunch of fat people, and oh yeah, dinosaur monster things.The runaway, the main protagonist, claims to be a tool. Repeatadly, he states "I am a tool". Yes, he certainly is. He's being chased by the cyborgs and dinosaur things for some reason. This is something the movie revolves around.This movie is really terrible. The script is horrible. The camera work is crap. It's not interesting. The opening credits last way too long. There's no duologue or action for what seems to be the 1st 15 minutes. Hell, I'm not even sure what I just watched to be real honest with you. It's like a plate of spaghetti, but on TV.There are a couple qualities that are OK. The kick boxing is OK actually. I don't know who (the actors name here) is, but he's probably really into kick boxing or martial arts. Also the dinosaur things aren't done too bad. Don't get me wrong, it's obvious what they are, but I've seen just as bad or worse with other puppets. I don't get the size shifting thing, that's really just bad but still the puppets aren't bad.I would recommend not watching this movie. Surprisingly it's from 1997, but looks like it was made in the 70s. Perhaps it was made in the 70s or 80s, and just not released until 1997. It's a huge pile, you've been warned.1/10