Ninja Terminator (1985)

Who payed the critics

It isn't all that great, actually. Really cheesy and very predicable of how certain scenes are gonna turn play out. However, I guess that's the charm of it all, because I would consider this one of my guilty pleasures.

The movie is wonderful and true, an act of love in all its contradictions and complexity

Excellent and certainly provocative... If nothing else, the film is a real conversation starter.

I have just watched Ninja Terminator on DVD (which cost me less than a packet of crisps) and I have to say "WOW". I have no idea what just happened. But what I do know is that it involved a jaguar, a woman's blond wig on a bearded Japanese man, robotic toy robots that manage to walk right into peoples houses, a golden action man with swords, martial arts (and/or gymnastics), stylish ninja jogging, ponchos of various colours, less blood than a heavily censored episode of the teletubbies, and some kind of plot ...or two.For those wondering what a "Ninja Terminator" is, I can tell you this- I have just watched the movie and I still have no idea! The name of this film is justified by dubbing in one line that says "...and I am the ninja terminator!" at a really random point. Other more suitable names could have been: "The man with the golden wig", or "insert name here".This movie is about as "B" as a b-movie can get, without buzzing around the room stinging things. It's getting a 10 out of 10 for being the best crappiest movie I've ever seen --with the exception of Jack Frost (the killer snowman), but that's a whole different genre, and a different kind of 'cult'.Ninja Terminator. Get it, watch it, laugh at it.

Watched this again last night just to remind myself what a great director like Godfrey Ho can do.Ninja Terminator is unbelievable from start to finish. Notice the clever, abstract almost Lynchian touches where he seems to be showing us a different film from the one we are watching. See the amazing lifelike crabs in Richard Harrison's kitchen - not steamed crabs but drunken crabs...Now I ask you, what other film has got drunken (or steamed) crabs? Hmmm??? None! Thats right...and that shows why Godfrey Ho is ahead of the pack.The acting, as usual, is superb. The sheer presence of Richard Harrison carries the film as usual with a Godfrey Ho epic but the Jaguar Wong character also engages with his non-stop smiling persona and seemingly limitless energy as he beats up assailant after assailant with no problem at all.For more evidence of the greatness of Godfrey Ho and Richard Harrison look no further than their masterpiece, Ninja Squad, which I will review at a later date. Ninja Squad is perhaps an even better showcase of Godfrey Ho's talent and genius.

I'm extremely glad to read the other reviews for this film and see that there are others out there that understand just how awesome this film is. My recommendation is that you watch this film with a large group of friends and a chilled crate of beer at the ready; you'll never look back. When I watched it we blasted the volume nearly to full, and while it was kinda painful during the opening scene where a bizarre high-pitched squeal comes out of the mysterious golden case (pulp fiction anyone?!!) it soon became a mind blowing experience. THX or DTS this is not, but man does it pack a punch. In terms of scenes I was especially fond of the extremely long shot of the gravestone and bank of grass while the two characters explained the storyline. First class. The red ninja trying to jump Harry in his apartment is legendary - he just appears in his cameo ninja suit and mascara instantly and kicks serious ass. Jaguar Wong was also a treble hard bastard. I'd miss-heard his name and thought it was Jaguar One so when I asked my friend where Jaguar Two was near the end I felt like a bit of a moron. Still, I wish Jaguar Wong was my dad.THIS FILM IS PURE CLASS

NINJA TERMINATOR is such a great film! When me and my friends get home on a Saturday morning after being out all Friday night, we love to watch it and laugh our arses off. My personal favourite part is the cemetery scene when the camera is focused on a big pile of dirt instead of the 2 characters having a conversation about their dead brother. There are so many amazing parts. The robot, the Garfield phone, slicing up melons, the unnecessary fire poi shots. favourite quote from the film? When Jaguar Wong asks for a cigarette, his kidnapper says "ok. Afterall, it's unlikely you'll contract lung cancer and die before i kill you!" This film is a piece of art. Absolute genius! Not sure if Godfrey Ho intended it to be like this but I'm glad it is. If you like films that are so bad they're good, check out Troll 2!